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This is the Hilariously Ridiculous Story of Shane, the Wal-Mart Deli Guy

walmart-deli-guy-shane

This is the tale of Shane, a Walmart deli counter employee.

Shane also has a special, calculated knack for driving his bosses crazy during the work day. It’s a surprise he’s not fired, but he’s continuously being scolded for doing things such as offering customers extended warranties on the fried chicken and cheekily labeling certain deli products as “stoner approved.”

Shane’s story is told through a series of pictures snapped by his co-worker, Reddit user Ardentleprechaun. The documented pictures expose Walmart back-room whiteboard, where -Management has to repeatedly scold Shane through written warnings.

As with any story with minimal documentation (Ardentleprechaun’s pictures are currently floating at the top of Reddit.com), we’re going to  assume, for the sake of storytelling, that Shane is a real person, and that these notes from –Management are real as well. Shane, if you’re reading this, I hope you keep walking the line of playful customer interaction and staying employed by Walmart.

Thanks for the laughs:

walmart-extended-warranties

walmart-free-samples

walmart-final-answer

walmart-deli-directions-to-albertsons

walmart-deli-equipment

walmart-good-stuff-in-the-back

walmart-swinecraft

walmart-multiple-name-tags

walmart-stoner-approved

walmart-ventrilo

walmart-mystery-meat

walmart-some-assembly-required

Via ardentleprechaun

By Elie Ayrouth

Elie is a product of Orange County, CA. In early 2012, his dentist diagnosed him with 8 different cavities, three of which on the same tooth, as a result of his 23-year Sour Patch Kid addiction.

31 replies on “This is the Hilariously Ridiculous Story of Shane, the Wal-Mart Deli Guy”

depends, as somebody whos worked retail more then once in his life, i can tell you, i have seen shit like this go on for years on end with management actually being somewhat amused by most of it…..(gotta do something to make work fun when you work with the public…..aka morons)

i had a buddy who did the stoner approved stickers on stuff at one place i worked(wont say where) but every bag of chips/candybar/ect on the way out of the store(those impulse buy racks) had them, it was amusing……specially when an Xian would get all bent out of shape….then before or after hitting up our place would go next door to buy wine/liquar(very common)….

I can say, as someone who managed for many years, I kept people who did stuff somewhat like this. If the customers love the person they will stay. Those of us in retail can have a sense of humour too, and if our customers do, we won’t have to fire someone who is this awesome.

It possibly could be real, or a practical joke on the actual employee. The practical jokers do exist at Wal-mart. A certain one has the entire overnight shift made up of them. Our customers love it, and the manager approves it as long as we do our jobs and get done on time!

At the Target that I used to work at we used to prank customers in the garden center all the time. We had a life sized nutcracker that, for some odd reason, had a removable head and we had a bunch of oversized Christmas tree ornaments (about the size of a human head) and we would stick the head somewhere to stare at the customers and give him an ornament for a head.

I remember once a customer saw it and was very disturbed so I switched it out and acted all nonchalant “Well, you know how kids can be when no one is watching them. They like to play pranks.” haha.

Actually, they not only fired Shane, they also had him shot as he exited
a small coffee and tobacco shop down in the historic district. The
place sold the best scones in town and also carried fine imported
cigars.

Later, a wreath was placed on the site and Wal-Mart management came by and placed this note on it:

“Shane, stop faking your own death and blaming us. — The Management.”

Even though it’s fake it’s still so great to dream of an employee with this level of not-getting-fired ability. I could see Shane getting his own comic book series by 2000AD where he travels the universe getting people mad at him and his zany hijinks, but always getting out of everything by just being the lovable rascal he is. Oh Shane, you goofball.

Fake? Real? Who cares? It made me laugh at the thought of it and I needed a chuckle. You go Shane, whoever/whatever/wherever you are!

Daaaaaaaaang, people, lighten up. Whether this is “fake” or not shouldn’t matter. It’s funny shit and it’s hilarious to imagine the scenarios.

My son (whose name happens to be Shane) and his dad were reading these last night and they were laughing their asses off.

Must be true because Walmart management has no sense of humor. Shane is being perfectly honest with his customers when he labels some samples as ‘Mystery Meat’.

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