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Gravy and Wasabi Candy Canes Make for the Cruelest Prank Ever

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I like me a good prank. You know– the harmless, slightly terrifying sort. But there are some jokes that just aren’t funny (hint: they’re secretly hilarious), especially when it comes to messing with one of my favorite holiday foods — candy canes.

Yes, gravy and wasabi-flavored candy canes now exist. Sure it sounds like an innocent idea and all, but these candies look like the one’s we’d normally eat. In fact, the manufacturer encourages prankster antics by suggesting we “sneak one in with regular candy canes.” Genius? Yep! (Just don’t pull a fast one on me.)

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If the idea of gravy and/or wasabi candy has you running for the hills, perhaps you can incorporate them into a sweet sushi or use ’em as a mashed potato topping. Maybe.

Gravy Candy CanesWasabi Candy Canes, $4.74, for set of 6 @Archie McPhee

H/T + PicThx Archie McPhee

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Features

25 Christmas Treats for Chocoholics

Christmas is a time for family, friends and chocolate. Naturally. So feast your eyes on these luscious cocoa wonders and bake some up for you and the gang. (Just make sure to save a few for Santa tonight!)

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Recipes

Here’s How to Make Deep Fried Little Debbie Christmas Trees

Strollin’ around a brightly fluorescent lit grocery store, a spotlight shined down from the ceiling onto something at the far end of an aisle. Feeling like one of the three Wise men following the north star during Biblical times, I made the journey towards the light. What was I going to find when I reached my destination? Treasures? Little Baby Jesus? Wrong, I kneeled down and picked up the LAST box of Little Debbie’s Christmas Tree Cakes. Hallelujah. Angels started singing

 I eat Debbies, I drink Shiner

at the same damn time.

I was given the gift from a higher power of the last Little Debbie’s Christmas Tree Cakes of the season. With this gift, it deserves to be transformed and showcased. The Fried Xmas Tree ornaments are born.

For the Holiday beer batter you need:

  • 1 – 12 oz Shiner Holiday Cheer
  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1/4 cup of sugar
  • 1 tablespoon of salt
  • 1 teaspoon of baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon of ground cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
  • 1 egg

Mix all dry ingredients first, then everything else. Mix in the Shiner at the end. Chill it. Heat 24 oz of canola oil to 350 degrees in a medium pot.

This season’s dark wheat brew from Shiner Brewery is the perfect choice for this batter. Its malty flavor still comes out along with the Texas peaches and roasted pecans. You better believe this is the drink choice for around the fire-pit this winter.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

Time to prep the ornaments. We’re in the kitchen, put that sewing needle and yarn away and pull out the bamboo skewer and butcher’s twine. Grab the box of trees and start stabbing holes, running string through, and tie knots like a Las Vegas wedding chapel on 12/21/12.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

The trees are now ready to bathe in the batter. Be careful not to pull out the trees too quickly after they are coated, they might break at the holes because of the extra batter weight. Let the excess batter drip off.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

This is were I get excited and start feeling that Xmas cheer! Slowly lower the beer-battered holiday ornament into the hot oil (a sentence I thought I would NEVER say). Oh man, the smell of this frying brought me back to State Fair days, passing by the funnel cake stands. Fry each side for less than a minute until golden brown. Remove fried goodness and drain any excess oil on a paper towel. Set aside to cool.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

What’s the holidays without a family bonding activity? Have the kiddos (or drinking buddies) decorate the ornaments. Use festive icing, sprinkles, and powdered sugar. Make it a contest for the best looking ornaments. The loser gets to spend Christmas in a corner… I kid, I kid.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

Now this is a Xmas tree! The Glut Life tree got some fried ornaments around it, no fugazi. Finally biting into this piece of heaven on a string will fill you with holiday cheer! The batter is crunchy on the outside and fluffy with hints of vanilla, cinnamon and peach. (This would make a dope funnel cake BTW) The frosting on the Little Debbie is contained in the batter shell and the cake is warmed from the frying.

An angel might get his wings when a bell rings, but after he takes a bite of this he’s not gonna want to fly, just park and sip.

 

Done Right: Fried Xmas Tree

Oh… and Santa, we at The Glut Life made you a little som’n som’n. Tell the Misses to stop tha bitchin’, you gonna make it in a second. Beer battered chewy Chips Ahoy (leftover batter = excuse to fry anything)