Categories
Packaged Food Sweets

Deconstructed Twizzlers Now Exist And They’re Called IZZLERS

Feature photo courtesy of JunkBanter

Ever wonder what a Twizzler looked like completely unraveled?  Turns out you have to wonder no longer.

Meet the Izzler, the deconstructed, untangled, and reverse-twisted cousin of the iconic Hershey’s Twizzler snack. Does it sound like a mouthful? Absolutely.

Spotted by JunkBanter, the Izzler is made with the exact same chewy confections of strawberry-flavored candy ropes that come inside a regular Twizzler. Kind of the perfect snack for those who aren’t about the twists and turns that come within each pack of Twizzlers. Pretty great if you’re trying to portion control your candy intake too.

Those interested in picking up a bag, can find them in such retail locations as Walmart where they’ll only be available for a limited time. Now, I wonder what an untwisted version of a Red Vine would look like?

Categories
Alcohol Deals Drinks Restaurants What's New

Applebee’s Newest One Dollar Margarita Comes With A Twizzlers Straw

With spring break and Tax Day on the horizon, Applebee’s is coming through in the clutch with a nostalgic boozy treat on a budget.

Photo courtesy of Applebee’s

Their monthly dollar drink special is the Strawberry Dollarita, a sweet iteration on their viral bargain beverage made with tequila, strawberry, and margarita mix. What makes this one extra special, however, is the Twizzlers straw it comes garnished with. It’ll take you back to kindergarten sippin’ on fruit punch in a heartbeat.

Applebee’s has been finding a lot of success in the Dollarita, with several different varieties on the drink deal coming out since its debut in October 2017. This latest one capitalizes on spring and nostalgia, making it a refreshing way to get a discount and get your drink on.

The Strawberry Dollaritas, complete with Twizzler straws, will be available for the entire month of April.

Categories
Humor

‘Twizzerling’ Might Just Be The Newest Food Trend You’re Too Old For

Twizzlering

So it seems a bunch of dudes on a road trip started a tasty new trend they call ‘Twizzerling.’ A YouTube video that’s quickly going viral shows a kid named Micah falling asleep in a car. He friends then proceed to stuff as many Twizzlers as they can in his mouth and around his face before he wakes up.

Thirteen was the number to beat. Check out the video below and see if you can top their score. Might try this next time one of the interns fall asleep on the couch.

Categories
Features

What 24 Pizzas From The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cartoon Look Like IRL

shitty-pizza-drop

As a kid, I loved watching the ’90s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon. Who didn’t? One of the things that stuck was all the ridiculous pizzas Michelangelo and his brothers would order throughout the series. As the years passed, I started to think some of those pizzas could actually be pretty delicious if done right. Though it did take a solid 22 years for anchovies to grow on me.

Like his Renaissance namesake, who would have thought Mikey was ahead of his time. Using some hunger-fueled imagination I recreated 24 of the most disgusting pizza orders from the TV show and turned them into something you could order at a restaurant. Cowabunga.

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Tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly

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Tuna ahi poke on top of a bed of seaweed salad and drizzled some hot, melted peanut butter and grape jelly on top. Went more for color than taste. Ending up tasting great so that worked itself out.

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Peanut butter and clams

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Drenched the pizza in a cajun peanut butter sauce with four fresh calms. The heat from the sauce really made the clams, no pun intended, pop. Crawfish for garnish.

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Peanut butter, avocado and extra pickles

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A bed of guacamole topped with avocado slices, melted peanut butter and some sweet dill pickle chips. This is actually a sandwich I make on many an occasion.

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Marshmallow and pepperoni

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Pepperoni and cheese pizza topped with roasted marshmallows. The marshmallows look like haunting little lifeboats on a sea of pepperoni.

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Marshmallow and asparagus

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Asparagus and cheese baked directly into the crust and topped with toasted mini marshmallows. Had to many different versions of this one before I settled on this. Couldn’t be happier.

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Guacamole and Marshmallow

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A generous heap of freshly made guacamole and topped with a single marshmallow lit on fire. Kids, don’t try this at home. Grownups, go nuts.

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Butterscotch, onions and anchovies

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Onion and anchovies caramelized in brown sugar and a butterscotch sauce. Tasted great but stunk up my kitchen like nobody’s business. Do turtles have nostrils?

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Tea and toast

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A buttered slice of toast on top of tomato sauce and sprinkled with tea leaves, parmesan cheese and more tomato sauce. The original concept for this had chunks of toast drenched in tea. NOT. APPETIZING.

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Chocolate sprinkles and clam sauce

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A cheese pizza made with a hearty clam sauce and chocolate sprinkles and garnished with green onions. Not easy to make clam sauce pop on a pizza. Had to tweak it into a chowder. Master Splinter would be proud.

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Chocolate-chip

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Chocolate chips baked into the pizza and drenched with a generous amount of hot fudge. It’s essentially a cookie.

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Chocolate fudge with extra garlic

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A generous amount of fried garlic on top of a pool of melted chocolate fudge. Definitely not something you’d order on a first date, but then again, are any of these pizzas?

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Chocolate fudge, sardine, chili pepper, whipped cream

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A cheese and whipped cream pizza topped with shaved chocolate fudge and red chili flakes. Served with a fried sardine filet in chocolate fudge sauce. Any nutrients that piece of sardine contains is neutralized by that mountain of whipped cream. I guarantee it.

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Anchovies and hot fudge

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Hot chocolate fudge drizzled over anchovy filets on a sauceless white pizza. Until the day anchovies turn into giant mutated fish that eat people, they’ll forever be my favorite fish.

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Pepperoni and hot fudge

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A classic pepperoni and cheese pizza drizzled with a little chocolate fudge. Just a little. We’re not animals.

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Pepperoni and pickles

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Cheese and pepperoni pizza with sweet dill pickle chips. The pickles add a crunch that can be heard all through the New York sewer systems.

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Jelly bean and sausage

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A spicy pork chorizo and sour cream pizza topped with queso fresco and fresh cilantro and served with a jalapeño jellybean gastrique. The jelly beans had us stumped but luckily Reddit came to the rescue.

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Salami pizza with double yogurt

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Two servings of vanilla yogurt topped with fresh salami slices and drizzled with blackberry jelly. If you can get over the idea of salami and yogurt, it goes down pretty tastily.

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Shredded coconut and sweet pickles

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Pizza is topped with shredded coconut, drizzled with hot mustard and topped with sweet pickle chips. Shredder would be a crazy handy guy to have in this situation.

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Strawberry with anchovy sauce

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Caramelized strawberries served with an anchovy butter sauce and topped with whipped cream. This one was the most difficult to come up with. Thankfully, whipped cream saved the day.

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Hot oatmeal

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Hot, buttery oatmeal topped with brown sugar, honey and fresh strawberries. It’s another side to breakfast pizza.

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Popcorn

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Truffle oil popcorn with parsley flakes and parmesan cheese. There’s a pizza somewhere under that mountain of popcorn.

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Anchovies and banana

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Caramelized rum bananas and anchovy filets. The pizza that inspired this post. The bananas and anchovies were the perfect balance of sweet and salty.

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Goulash

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Hot goulash served with crumbles of queso fresco. After a quick Google search of what exactly goulash was, it was pretty easy to make.

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Granola and licorice 

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Vanilla yogurt topped with granola and shaved red licorice. It was a bitch to hand shred licorice, but doesn’t it look pretty?

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Video for verification

Categories
Features

Why Twizzlers Are — And Always Will Be — Better Than Red Vines

twizzlers vs red vines

I’m done hearing people argue over whether Red Vines or Twizzlers is the better candy. I’ve known that Twizzlers were superior from the moment I spat out a mouthful of vile, waxy, red goo and my mom asked me, “What, you don’t like Red Vines?” The answer is no. I don’t like Red Vines. Twizzlers are so obviously better that it’s hard for me to believe that anyone could actually prefer chomping on the candy equivalent of a tree stump, but I understand that these people exist. And they need to be proven wrong.  Let me break it down all nice and simple for you.

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Twizzlers taste better.

Twizzlers come in a bunch of different flavors like strawberry, chocolate, cherry, and watermelon. Red Vines come in two flavors: red and black. The red version used to be called “raspberry vines” but now they’re just “red twist” flavored.

You know what else tastes “red”? Satan.

ckimkard

PicThx Jason Mercier

 

And we all know how the world feels about black licorice.

black-licorice1PicThx NatalieDee.com

 

Size matters.

The standard length for both Twizzlers and Red Vines is a solid 8 inches, but Twizzlers also sells 9.5 inch Pull n’ Peels, plus the 2-foot “extra long” variety. That’s sixteen more inches of customer satisfaction.

patricia_ford_twizzlers_desktop_1024x768_wallpaper-281363

PicThx HDWallpaper

 

Red Vines are trying to kill you.

Twizzlers never tried to feed anyone lead.

licoricePicThx CBS

 

Red Vines are sold in giant four pound tubs.

Eating that much candy takes forever, and by the time you finish the tub, all the Red Vines inside are stale and hard enough to shatter every tooth in your skull.

teef

PicThx Andrew Phelps

 

Twizzlers will save your relationships.

Twizzlers are soft, like pillows and puppies and clouds. If someone you love is having a bad day, handing them a Twizzler is like giving them a strawberry-scented hug.

teddybearPicThx to Ebay

 

If you try to comfort someone with a stale Red Vine, you’ll be turning their life into a Charlie Brown special.

CBPicThx Tumblr

 

Twizzlers love America.

This is strawberry-flavored patriotism at its finest.

LibertyPicThx Middle Aged Diva

 

Red Vines love Taylor Lautner.

This is a llama who starred in Twilight.

taylor lautnerPicThx Jason Mecier

The choice is clear, people.

 

Celebrities hate Red Vines.

Screen Shot 2013-03-07 at 4.59.09 PMPicThnx Twitter

Let’s put this in perspective real quick: Ke$ha drinks her own urine and she still can’t stand the way Red Vines taste. Maybe she just doesn’t appreciate lead in her snack food . . . or maybe Red Vines taste worse than human piss.

Twizzlers are more educational.

Twizzlers motivate young children to learn about science because they’re delicious and sturdy enough to create a 3D model of the double helix that revolutionized the field of genetics.

DNA PicThx Jdwow

 

Also, THIS:

Red Vines create octopus/spider hybrid bikinis and unleash them upon the world.

why

PicThx Jokeroo

 

Final conclusion: Twizzlers win, Red Vines lose, everyone goes home happy.

This debate doesn’t have to end nasty. After all, if Red Vines didn’t exist, Twizzlers wouldn’t have any way to prove their superiority. I’m not trying to say you should change your personal preference if you really think that Red Vines are better than Twizzlers. I’m just letting you know that you’re wrong.

Case closed.

P.S

brad

PicThx chzbgr, Header PicThx thesweetesttemptations

Categories
Sweets

Hamburger, Fries and Shake…Get the Birthday Cake Treatment

One of our favorite cake hobbyists, Laura LeClair Kelly, has just churned out another fanciful platter of cakes for her boy’s 13th birthday party — Hamburger, Fries and Shake.

The same cake decorator that wowed Interwebs with her ridiculous Taco Bell Birthday Cake last year has gone on to produce some awfully fun cakes, mostly in celebration of her family, which always leads to some fun and whimsical twists.

In the case of her most recent creation for her son’s 13th birthday party (above), she utilized a chocolate chip cookie dough cake with brown sugar buttercream to simulate a hamburger bun, dark chocolate “meat,” sour cream pound cake “Fries” and chocolate cake “Shake” with brown sugar buttercream frosting and a melted down Twizzler fashioned into a cherry.

The condiments used throughout are melted Starbursts, fondant and tinted buttercream. It looks to be a happy birthday for a lucky thirteen year old!

 

Categories
Cravings

Craving: Twizzlers

You can make mustaches, stick figures, picture frames or really just about anything your mind can imagine. And then eat it. That’s why twizzlers rule, because they are just amazing tasting ropes of fun. I like to tie the entire batch in a big rope then climb out my window hoping not to fall the 2 feet to the ground. (Thx Bakerella)