Categories
Alcohol Drinks Hit-Or-Miss Tastemade/Snapchat

10 Drinks That Are Guaranteed To Induce A Hangover

Alcohol can be a best friend one night and a sworn enemy the next day. It’s a fickle relationship, to say the least. That sworn enemy part? It comes in the form of a hangover, which will greet you in the morning with the gentle warmth of a sledgehammer to the face.

Now, while there are many variables at play when it comes to a hangover — drinking on an empty stomach, not enough water in the evening, etc — it all comes down to pretty simple reasons. You get hangovers because of things like, sugar, carbonation, and congeners.

Instead of going through the science outright, though, let’s get all hyped up on science by walking it through a few drinks that are sure to do damage to your body.

Red Wine

A post shared by Cam Stokes (@stokes.cam) on


Red wine may be a class-act accessory the night before, but it’s an aggressive bully the morning after. Congeners, a fermentation byproduct that strikes up the morning hangover band, contribute to a wine’s color. So the darker a wino goes, the worse they’ll feel. White wine may not always prove its worth as an evening drink, but it’ll keep a drinker’s head from caving in the next day.

Darker Liquors

A post shared by The At Home Chef (@chefken) on

Likewise, liquors of a darker shade —  your bourbons, your brandys, your dark rums — are ready to sabotage the morning-after for the same reason, those dang congeners. Bourbon’s actually the fiercest culprit, having the 40 times the quantity of congeners than in vodka.

Cheap Liquor

A post shared by NWL (@northwest_lifestyle) on

Liquor tends to have higher alcohol concentrations than its beer and wine brethren. And the cheaper the spirit, the more congeners. So scooping the cheapest booze is the fastest route to a forced day in bed. Honestly, though, who’s surprised that the most affordable thing at the bar betrays you in the end?

Champagne

A post shared by Nia Gharou (@nia.gharou) on

Why a more lofty drink like champagne ends up as a head pounder always seems to be up for discussion. It’s a go-to celebratory toast drink, but it’ll knock out the brain come sun-up. The reason is it comes down to the fact that it’s jam-packed with bubbles. That carbon dioxide helps get the alcohol into a drinker’s blood stream faster than other kinds of alcohol.

Booze Mixed With Soda or Juice

A post shared by Benjamin Ozuna (@badass_ben) on

This is basically just pouring sugar down the gullet, so it’s no surprise it makes a person feel like hell come morning. The fact that alcohol is involved is doing absolutely nobody any favors — except maybe the tastebuds. Whether it’s whiskey and cola or vodka and orange juice, if the mixer is super sweet, there’s a chance the next day will come with a super headache.

Fruity Colorful Cocktails

This is going to strike the same way soda and juice do, mostly because they may be hiding beneath that tiny umbrella. Anything that has a pretty color to it has a good chance of becoming your frienemy. It’s going to be an entire witch’s brew of booze that then disguises the whole festive monstrosity with sweeteners. Witchcraft, I say!

Booze with Energy Drinks

A post shared by Eve (@evenightclub) on

Not only are energy drinks major players when it comes to hangovers, but mixing a depressant and a stimulant together is no good for a human being from the start. It basically has the potential to rile a person up to drink more for longer than one’s body would initially agree to. Plus, the sugar content of energy drinks is bonkers to begin with.

Gimmicky Nonsense Shots in a Dive Bar

A post shared by Aswariya (@ayee.esss) on

This will priority mail your brain a hangover for a number of reasons. It could be a goofball sugary concoction with some innuendo name, it could be the cheapest booze in the house that they hide with sugar, or it’s some maniac pour like a ‘bar mat shot’, which is exactly what it sounds like — all the spilled liquid on the bar, squeezed into a shot glass. This kind of lunacy is best (and hopefully only) limited to a 21st birthday, and even then, like, why?

Long Island Iced Tea

A post shared by QkickZ (@qkickz) on

If anyone orders a drink that at its core is a selection of gin, rum, tequila, vodka, and triple sec — especially one that hides them vixens and villains with sour mix and a splash of cola — it can’t really be that much of a blindside once everything goes haywire. These will deliver a boxer-like hangover because the drinker is simply downing all the booze together in what will surely be an accidental half dozen orders.

Literally Any Drink With ‘Adios’ or ‘Goodbye’ or ‘So Long’ or ‘911’ in the Title

A post shared by Erica Lopez (@sweetheartlopez) on

These kinds of drinks essentially take the spirit of Long Island Iced Teas, but turn it into more direct chaos. Sometimes, they’ll act like it’s a mystery concoction that just randomly showed up one day. This could be anything from a Slushee that’s, like, three-fourths Bacardi 151 to a blue lagoon fishbowl of tequila that looks like someone could swim in it. Anything that hints at a blackout in its name can, will, and should absolutely beat a person up like crazy. This is how you lose an entire weekend.

 

Photo by: @eatingplacestogether, https://www.instagram.com/eatingplacestogether/
Categories
#foodbeast Culture Tastemade/Snapchat

Here Are Seven Of The Most Impressive Child Chefs You Should Know About

The two most challenging parts of adulthood are making sure you don’t die, and feeding yourself. Of course the easiest way to ensure the latter is to eat out for every meal, but that gets expensive. When your bank account is dying, it’s time to turn to the kitchen. We don’t know about you, but no victory in there is too small. Every time we successfully boil water is a good day in the books. That was until we realized there is such a thing as a child chef.

You wouldn’t think the two words go together, but shows like MasterChef Junior have validated this phenomenon. Here are some of the most baller child chefs out there who will most definitely make you feel like a total scrub in the kitchen.

1. Flynn McGarry


It’s not an exaggeration when we say Flynn McGarry accomplished more by age twelve than we have in our entire lives. This youngster first started to hone his knife skills at age ten. Shortly thereafter, McGarry started a supper club from his mom’s house in Studio City, California, called EUREKA. Each dining session hosted 20 guests, and included ten different courses. After mastering the art of the supper club, McGarry staged (a.k.a. was invited) to come work in the kitchen for several acclaimed restaurants, including Eleven Madison Park, Alinea, Next, and Modernist Cuisine. Almost all of these have had or currently have a Michelin star. Of course, McGarry continued the supper club while working. Eventually, EUREKA became a monthly pop-up hosted at BierBeisl in Beverly Hills, and also traveled across the country to San Francisco, Los Angeles, and NYC. He has been listed in Zagat’s 30 under 30 chefs of Los Angeles, and Time Magazine included him in their list of the top 25 most influential teens.

2. Sarah Lane


If there’s one thing Sarah Lane possesses in addition to her impressive culinary skills, it’s a standout personality. She entertained many during her tenure on the show MasterChef Junior, which she participated in at age nine. Sarah was thrown into the restaurant scene pretty early in life: her grandmother owned a restaurant, at which she started making appearances as a wee babe. Apparently she was taught how to make coffee when she was just four years old. While Sarah didn’t win MasterChef, she impressed Gordon Ramsay with her ability to make a perfect Beef Wellington. Since her time on the show, she participated in the LA Cookie Con in 2016 as a special guest.

3. Estie Kung


Estie Kung, a.k.a. Chef Estie was brought to the world’s attention when she starred in the new show, Man vs. Child: Chef Showdown, on the FYI Network this past year. Estie is currently eight years old, the youngest competitor ever on the show, and her favorite foods are steak tartare, caviar, and lobster, so you know her palate is way more refined than ours. Plus, she already knows how to make homemade pasta, is a star Girl Scout, and is already able to read at a 6th grade level. This little wunderkind is from Hollywood and started cooking when she was only three years old.

4. Greg Grossman

A post shared by Greg Grossman (@greg_grossman) on


Greg Grossman is often called the Justin Bieber of the food world. Even if you aren’t a Belieber, you hear that and know this guy is good. So good, in fact, that he is unanimously considered a culinary prodigy by anyone he’s met. Grossman began his foray into the food scene by washing dishes at a local restaurant when he was eight years old. By age nine, he was asked to work on the line in said restaurant. Then, two years later, when he was only ten years old, he started his own catering service in the Hamptons. Wut. Even from a young age, Grossman’s passions lay in molecular gastronomy, and his idol was Ferrán Adrià of elBulli restaurant fame. He fancy. Grossman also worked in Alinea in Chicago with Grant Achatz, and received the first ever Martha Stewart Scholar Award in 2009. In 2015, Grossman became the executive chef at Georgica in The Hamptons, when he was only 18. Currently, he has his own restaurant called Oreya, which opened in June 2016 in Southampton.

5. Logan Guleff


Logan Guleff is another child chef with a pretty impressive resume. He began cooking when he was just two years old, and started a food blog called “Order Up! With Logan,” when he was eight. Guleff then won his first cooking contest by the age of nine. The contest was hosted by JIF and Guleff won the prize for most creative sandwich, which got him a feature on The Today Show. It was all up from there. Logan continued to win contests, including the Epicurious Kid’s State Dinner Healthy Lunch Challenge in August 2012, which allowed him to meet and dine with President Obama and the First Lady. In 2014, Logan participated in MasterChef Junior, and won. The meal that sealed the deal for Logan was pretty extravagant, and consisted of saffron spot prawns, salt-crusted branzino, and Meyer lemon madeleines with berry compote and goat cheese mousse. We’d hire him to be our personal chef, tbh.

6. Danielle McNerney

Photo By: NBC
Danielle McNerney stated cooking at age four and considers herself a self-made chef. She is known for her healthy yet delicious meals, which she started crafting after her mother was diagnosed with Merkel cell carcinoma. The family needed to convert to healthy, organic foods, and Danielle took on the challenge. Danielle won the California Strawberry Commission’s #KidsCookOff recipe competition with a strawberry basil quinoa salad. In December 2015, Danielle competed on NBC’s show Food Fighters, where she went head-to-head with renowned cake master Duff Goldman.

7. Nathan Odom


Nathan Odom got into cooking around the age of ten when he started attending cooking classes as part of the Scratch Culinary Education Program in San Diego, California. As part of this curriculum, Nathan helped prepare a three-course meal at a local restaurant for the public. About two years later, after Nathan’s passion for cooking began to marinate, he tried out for MasterChef Junior. Nathan ended up winning season three. San Diego was pretty happy about this, and The City Council officially deemed March 17 “Nathan Odom Day.” Currently, Nathan is thirteen years old and serving as the judge for cooking competitions and the like.

Categories
Culture Hacks Hit-Or-Miss Tastemade/Snapchat

7 Foods and Drinks To Keep You Warm (And One That Won’t)

 

If you can manage to type with mittens on, you’ve probably tried to Google just about every thing in a feeble attempt to try and keep warm. Well, today’s your lucky day because this list of foods and beverages will actually raise your body temperature. Let it snow!

 

Ice Water

glass-of-cold-water

Photo: How it Works

Seems counterintuitive, don’t it? Your whole life you’ve been raised to believe that warm drinks like hot chocolate are perfect winter beverages. But your base body temperature will actually fluctuate to try and counteract the effects of hot liquid, meaning your body temperature will drop from drinking even one cup of cocoa. Cold water has the opposite effect, raising your core temperature to counteract the chilly liquid.

 

Coffee

shutterstock_249549703-0-0

Photo: Eater Chicago

As a subsection of the last paragraph, it’s important to note that coffee will actually help you heat up, but it has nothing to do with the warmth of the beverage. As a matter of fact, you’d actually be better drinking iced coffee. It’s the high amounts of caffeine in coffee which stimulate your metabolism, encouraging your body to burn fuel. I works best black, since cream and sugar will just break down instantly and produce a sugar crash.

 

Peanuts

peanuts

Photo: Flipboard

Good grief! Peanuts are high in vitamin B-3, which promotes blood flow and kick starts your metabolism — two key components in fending off the cold. With healthy fats and plenty of protein, they’re a smart snack any time of year, but will definitely help you combat dropping temperatures.

 

Brown Rice

488541184_xs

Photo: Livestrong

Refined rices and flours turn into simple carbs almost instantly, leading to sugar crashes like the ones mentioned above. Brown rice, on the other hand, is a complex carbohydrate that your body will breakdown slowly over time, resulting in prolonged release of energy and (you guessed it) heat.

 

Fresh Ginger

ginger-and-health-benefits-of-ginger

Photo: Nature and Nutrition

Ginger is another way to get your blood flowing, which will help warm your extremities and keep away the chills. While you might be tempted to throw this spice into a dish or soup, you’ll maximize your benefits if you eat the root raw. You’ll also get similar (but less noticeable effects) from other roots like carrots and beets.

 

Cayenne Pepper

chile-cayenne-ground-1

Photo: Savory Spice Shop

Finally, a spicy food on this list. While any spicy pepper will help you break into a quick sweat, you’ll also notice the prolonged effect of digesting the fiery fruits. This is due to the chemical called capsaicin that is found in all peppers, meaning you’ll experience similar results with jalapenos and habaneros as well.

 

Coconut Oil

coconuts-coconut-oil-on-spoon

Photo: Coconut Oil

Much like peanuts, coconut oil is full of healthy fats, which turn into fuel instead of spare tires. Again, essentially, you’re promoting your metabolism to do what it does: generate energy that makes you feel warm. Not to mention other benefits of coconut oil, like its antiviral and blood sugar-stabilizing properties.

 

NOT Alcohol

no-alcohol

Photo: Dennis Heppner

Despite rumors to the contrary, alcohol is actually a horrible way to stay warm. The rush of heat that drinkers feel is actually the warm, fresh blood leaving their core and heading to their extremities. Though you might feel warm in the short term, it will actually make it harder to stay warm over time and increase your risk of hypothermia.

Categories
Cravings

This Is The Most Erotic Poem About Pizza I’ve Ever Heard [WATCH]

Poetry can be beautiful, it can lift your spirits, it can take you to a place you never thought possible. And then there’s times when poetry wants to make you take a shower with pizza and do dirty things.

As our own Elie Ayrouth went down to St. Louis to find out what goes down after hours during Tastemade’s “All Nighter” show, he stumbled upon a slam poetry session and dropped a poem about his favorite cheesy pie that could almost be mistaken for a Too $hort verse.

Elie has a knack for turning anything sexual, as his Nikki Giovanni-like spoken word flows actually had the crowd bobbing their heads.

Pizza
Pizza is life
Pizza is sexy
It’s curvy, it’s saucy
Pizza is my wife
It’s deep, deep dish
No, no deep sea fish on my pizza
Paper thin crust
Mile-long cheese pulls
Mountains of pepperoni and basil
It’s nipply in Napoli
Cheese drips everywhere
My food boner burstin’ through my jeans, every seam wih me and my slice
Is ripe with wide eyes, for better or worse, I can’t see the world outside
I need a drink just thinking about my love for this piece of bread, sauce an cheese
It makes me weak to my knees and despite what’s outside
I keep my eyes on the pie
Just one piece, maybe two, maybe six
There’s no bad day for pizza
And even when the pizza’s bad, I want a garbage bag
full of seconds and thirds
until my stomach spits
and this world has heard that I got love for pizza
I want to fold it, I want to rip it
let it wrap around my tongue
as I run up the spiral staircase of a food boner building on my ground floor
the delivery guy’s almost here
I can’t wait to start eating some pizza

Its lines were almost like Kanye’s McDonald’s poem, except pizza trumps MCD fries any day.

There’s a very specific type of person who thinks of sex and pizza at the same time. If this poem makes you feel some type of way, you now know you are one of those people.

Categories
Adventures

Your Childhood Just Exploded With This Ecto Cooler Fried Twinkie Recipe

Some good did come from that awful-looking Ghostbusters remake, as without its heavy promotion, the Key Lime Slime Twinkies and Hi-C’s Ecto Cooler drinks would have never made their way back on store shelves and into our 80s-loving hearts.

The green slime-inspired products look like they’d make a perfect couple on Love Connection, so our buddy Nick Chipman from Dude Foods found a way to masterfully mix the two for a ghastly recipe that’ll leave your tongue green with envy, and food coloring.

We first saw this recipe come to life on Tastemade’s All Nighter show, as our own Elie Ayrouth strolled into Chipman’s Wisconsin home and watched the man put it together. As Elie spent the night trying to figure out what the night life is like in Milwaukee, it only seemed natural to visit the Frankenfood King at 4 a.m.

Chipman essentially made a neon green Ecto Cooler batter, dumped some Key Lime Slime Twinkies in it, and dropped it into the fryer like my mixtape. As an added bonus, Chipman added some mint custard, seeing how it’s a big deal in Wisconsin.

Sure this dessert looks a little gnarly, but it beats out that garbage Ghostbusters trailer, any day.

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

An All Nighter Guide To Getting Legally High And Eating Through Denver [WATCH]

all-nighter-denver

The legalization of marijuana in Denver has only bolstered an already eclectic social scene. In addition to their bustling craft breweries, there is now a host of legal dispensaries ready to serve you marijuana you can smoke, eat and even drink. Of course, one of the most glorious parts about a legal dose of marijuana is the damn near criminal level of munchies that immediately takeover your night.

In the latest episode of All Nighter, a new web series that chases me around different cities in the wee hours of the morning, I hop right off the plane, smoke a legal blunt with a bunch of strangers, and embark on the nastiest, sloppiest, most delicious and inebriated food journey I could pack into one night.

The fine reporters at BroBible have already broken down the episode’s hot eateries, while a journalist at The Kind has dug into the episode’s exploration of craft brewers vs. craft marijuana dispensaries. I also use a marijuana friend-finder app which helped me find people to indulge with, drive me around in a limo, and was able to order a pizza straight to the limo.

Denver is a hell of a place:

Categories
Adventures

What I Learned About Hollywood By Getting Drunk With Jack Sparrow

Above is Episode 1 of our new series All Nighter we’ve made with Tastemade. This story is what I learned about Los Angeles by drinking with Jack Sparrow on Hollywood Blvd.

1am it is. Hollywood Blvd is void of its daytime crowd, a few stragglers here and there, myself, our skeleton TV crew of Los Angeles natives, some homeless, and a few B-grade cosplayers. Jim, our rugged MacGyver sound guy tucks away behind a corner, artfully always out of frame. James, our fearless director and camera man is bug-eyed, his Jew-fro looking ever more all-over-the-place as he digs up our next shot.

“It’s dead out,” James manages surveying the empty streets, his face bleak and fatigued. Being up past 8pm is not a good look on skinny Seth Rogen.

I’m fucking sober. Wait, he can’t hear me. “I’m fucking sober.”

I have several airplane bottles of whiskey digging into my thigh, it’s been at least an hour since our last location filming All Nighter, and my buzz is fading quickly. Too long between sips and my energy is over. Too many drinks and I’m an asshole incapable of holding a conversation.

jack-sparrow-superman

Superman and Jack Sparrow pose with some fans on Hollywood Blvd.

“Take a picture with Jack Sparrow and Superman,” James demands, as we walk up to a couple costumed actors. Jack Sparrow fit the bill nicely, a 40-year-old man with bags under his eyes. His sidekick, a high school-aged Superman, felt a little less accurate. He was baby-faced and endearing with virgin teeth and a costume two sizes too big. Superman flexes, Jack Sparrow gives me his gun, we all mean mug for James.

All Night

A photo posted by Elie (@bookofelie) on

James puts the camera down and immediately turns into a producer, “we have reservations at a bowling alley down the street, you guys want to bowl with our host for a scene in the show?”

Jim pops out from behind the corner with his sound equipment, Jack Sparrow takes note of the new addition to our TV street gang. Jack Sparrow speaks, “they don’t allow costumes there.”

James immediately begins the most trivial, yet oddly fascinating negotiating process I’ve ever been witness to. “How much for your time?”

“Well…we make about $5 a photo? Maybe $25 for a couple hours?” Sparrow said, initiating the casting process. I immediately began calculating this gentleman’s time in my head, and then looked over at the wide-eyed Superman who looked on in eager anticipation. Their night was wrapping up anyways, they both seemed pretty eager to be on camera and have their last hour of their work day accounted for.

Our crew walks away for a few moments to regroup. I crack open a high school-sized mini bottle of whiskey to lubricate.

We make a call to the bowling alley, and they concur that no costumed men are allowed. James makes an executive decision that the scene only works with Jack Sparrow, and the inclusion of Superman would crowd the frame.

By the time we returned to Jack and Superman, the two were lit up with excitement. Superman had apparently called his mom and told him he needn’t a ride any longer, and had picked up contact lens solution from the CVS up the street in preparation for his sleepover at Jack Sparrow’s.

James breaks the news that we’ll only need Jack Sparrow for the scene, he offers them both cash for their time, but that Superman would have to sit just off frame for the sake of the shot. I gulp and look at Superman’s young, once rosy cheeks and watch the color of opportunity wash away from his face. In that moment I saw every failed opportunity Hollywood ever dealt this young Superman in the gloss of his eyes. What would he tell his mom tomorrow morning when she asked how his night went?

I’d spent my entire life living just a half hour away from Los Angeles in sunny Orange County, but never once had I witnessed Hollywood in action. I’d heard about struggling actors, dealing with rejection, putting your heart out there week-after-week, but until this moment, I had never seen it in person. And just like that, we marched on to a dark alleyway because of course, “the show must go on.”

gin-cocktail

drinking-jack

Jack Sparrow and I shared a few “street cocktails” and hammed up for the camera about the beauty of California, particularly Los Angeles.  

Our conversation brings up the usual themes, LA’s perfect weather, beautiful women, the land of opportunity — the entire boozy conversation occurring in an ironically dark back alley between a Jack Sparrow impersonator and a silly food blogger. All the while a defeated and equally hardworking Superman is slumped on the curb just out of frame and within earshot, waiting for this damn scene to end.

And despite trekking all over Los Angeles that evening, everything I learned about Hollywood was cemented in this scene. It takes a James being a shrewd producer and diligent director. It takes a Jim to capture the sound. It takes a Jack Sparrow to roam Hollywood Blvd looking for a buck and a performance. It takes a young actor like Superman to get sidelined for a scene that means nothing in the grand scheme of his career.

And that’s Los Angeles. It resembles a series of opportunities that can look like a kid in a Superman costume on Hollywood Blvd, or a street corn vendor in the valley. An audience will only see a finished product, their favorite movie or an interview on TV — but therein lies the beauty of it all, the wake of a production, the romanticism of not knowing what your next project could be.

“That’s a cut,” James squeaks whirring his camera off. Jack and I have bonded, we hug it out because that’s what fifteen minutes of sharing high-level stories about California will do to some bros. As we emerge from the dark alley Jack gives me a few tips for finding a good steak on Hollywood Blvd and how excited he is that his hometown St. Louis Rams are becoming the Los Angeles Rams. Superman is silent.

The main Hollywood drag is just as quiet as when we left it. We bid a final farewell to our two heroes — they walk back towards the bright lights while our team makes an opposite march away from the hoopla — back into the darkness.

Thanks Los Angeles.

Categories
Adventures Features Restaurants Tastemade/Snapchat

These 7 Pirate-Themed Restaurants Arrrr Hidden Treasures

Sometimes it’s not enough to crave fresh seafood and a bottle of rum. Now and then, you want to be transported back in time to when peg-legged bandits roamed the high seas. When you feel the need to scratch that scurvy-induced itch, here are eight pirate-themed restaurants you can plunder:

1. Pirate’s Landing Seafood and Steak Restaurant ElkinNorth Carolina

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.27.09 AM

Photo credit: Yelp

Your GPS might freak out when you pull up to Pirate’s Landing, but you definitely won’t miss it. The gigantic pirate ship-shaped restaurant is campy and casual with buccaneers bursting from the vaulted wood beams.

Nearby: This is mostly an unexpected get-off-the-freeway-there-is-a-pirate-ship-over-there pit stop on Interstate-77.

Must Eat: Buccaneer’s Fried Seafood Feast (Baby flounder, crab cake, clam strips, oysters, popcorn shrimp & scallops, and whatever else they caught that day)

Must Drink: Ravenswood Vintners Blend (spicy red wine that doesn’t always get its due)

2. Blue Bayou Anaheim, California

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.27.19 AM
Photo Credit: Walt Disney Company

The decor may be more New Orleans than Tortuga, but the Blue Bayou is famously adjacent to the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. You couldn’t pay more for the ambience because you’ve already shilled out for a ticket to Disneyland to get in. Jack Sparrow sightings not guaranteed.

Nearby: Um, hello, Disneyland! Also, Angel Stadium, the Honda Center, and far too many hotels.

Must Eat: Royal Street Seafood Jambalaya

Must Drink: Mint Julep

3. Smalley’s Caribbean Barbeque and Pirate Bar Stillwater, Minnesota

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.27.29 AM
Photo Credit: Yelp

When I say Minnesota, you say Caribbean barbeque! I know that feels unnatural, but Smalley’s not only brings the heat but brands a skull and crossbones into its burger’s buns to make sure you know. If you’re feeling sadistic, try their 666 wings with a side of “Death juice.”

Nearby: Pub 112 and the Minnesota-Wisconsin state line

Must Eat: Pirate Burger (obviously)

Must Drink: Trio of Dessert Rums (El Dorado Rum Cream / RumChata / Brinley Gold Coffee)

4. Macao Trading Co. New York, New York

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.27.42 AM
Photo Credit: Fashionista Jonz

For those who fancy Asian pirates and opium den opulence (who doesn’t?), Macao Trading Co. has you covered. Nestled in TriBeCa, Macao brings out the best of one the worst eras but holds onto the muddy lighting.

Nearby: Canal Street, Chinatown, Little Italy

Must Eat: African Chicken

Must Drink: Drunken Dragon’s Milk (Charbay Green Tea Vodka shaken with Young Coconut Puree, Thai Basil & Macao Five-Spice Bitters)

5. The Folly New York, New York

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.28.07 AM
Photo Credit: The Folly

This gastropub has an undeniable ship-like feel with a pirate themed menu to match. Of all Manhattan’s swashbuckling establishments, The Folly commits the most to the overall experience without the need for costumes.

Nearby: Washington Square Park, TriBeCa, Christopher Street

Must Eat: Lobster Mac & Cheese

Must Drink: Either of their frozen house grogs (Cuba Libre or White Zombie)

6. Pirate’s Dinner Adventure Theatre Buena Park, California

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.28.19 AM
Photo Credit: Visit Anaheim

This restaurant is for when you want dinner, a show, and to support the acting dreams of people who will probably never make it big. Let the kids enjoy the show while you take advantage of the full bar.

Nearby: Knott’s Berry Farm, Queen Mary, Aquarium of the Pacific

Must Eat & Drink: Whatever they tell you because the menu is fixed.

7. Forbes Island San Francisco, California

Screen Shot 2016-02-19 at 11.28.29 AM
Photo Credit: Till The Money Runs Out

Forbes Island walks the line between a nautical and pirate-y atmosphere. This restaurant is not for the seasick or claustrophobic; the dining area is underwater and the manmade island rocks gently with the waves.

Nearby: Fisherman’s Wharf, The Embarcadero, Golden Gate Bridge

Must Eat: Lamb Lollipops (Half Rack of Lamb, Potato Croquette, served on a bed of Edamame Succotash)

Must Drink: Anything off their wine list.