Categories
Restaurants

This Porn Star Just Opened A Restaurant That Specializes In Poop-Flavored Curry

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Screenshot: CNN

If you’re one of Japan’s most popular porn stars, naturally your next career move has to be in the food industry. That’s exactly what Ken Shimizu set out to do when he opened Curry Shop Shimizu. The Tokyo-based eatery will now and forever be known as the spot that serves poop-flavored curry.

CNN got a sneak peek at the curry shop and says the purpose of the place is to “Satisfy an unlikely lifelong desire to find out what excrement tastes like.”

Yep, because that’s what we dream of accomplishing with our taste buds.

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Screenshot: CNN

While not actual poop, the curry purposely mimics the texture and flavor of human excrement. Ingredients include fish, bitter tea, cocoa butter and other pungent additions. Pretty much it’s brown, runny and smells terribly.

Shimizu, under the screen name Shimiken, allegedly began his adult film career eating feces on camera. Sources say he ate the feces of more than 250 people, unofficially qualifying him as an authority on how poop should taste.

Since it’s opening in August, the restaurant has garnered a following of regulars that frequent the curry house. Also, of the first 300 visitors to the restaurant, 90 percent had finished their poo curry.

Licked. Clean.

Who knows how long Shimizu’s restaurant could last in Tokyo. A spot with a similar premise opened right here in California, only to go down the toilet.

Photos: CNN

Categories
Fast Food

Burger King Serving Creamy Orange PooPoo Smoothie — Yes Really

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Gotta love your unfortunate translations. Out in China, Burger King is now offering a nice, bright orange smoothie for summer, whose Chinese name means something like “mango ice smoothie with blow up pearls cold beverage.” In English though, it’s just “PooPoo.”

Coming from a place that thinks toilet-themed restaurants are a good idea, a “poo” smoothie might not seem completely outlandish, but rest assured: this shake is just crappy in name. Kotaku’s Eric Jou describes it as “pretty much like a Taiwanese Boba Tea” — mango flavored, with exploding lychee pearls.

Each shake comes topped with vanilla soft serve ice cream, but for, ahem, shits and giggles, you could always try ordering it with chocolate instead.

Categories
Humor

McDonald’s Refuses Service to Woman Riding Horse In Drive-Thru, Resulting in Smelly Retaliation

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Pro-tip: if you want McDonald’s to serve you while you’re on horseback, try not to let it leave a steaming pile of doo-doo in the dining room.

BBC reports that a woman in Whitefield, England and “a girl riding a pony” were denied drive-thru service Saturday after the staff informed them it was against company policy to do so, for “health and safety” reasons. Apparently not one to take such terrible customer service sitting down, the woman then took the horse inside the restaurant, where it let rip the whole McFlurry of reasons McDonald’s was right not to serve its owner in the first place. (Starting with the fact that she rode a horse through a McDonald’s drive-thru. I mean, at least class it up with a Starbucks or something, come on.)

“The sight and smell” of the horse’s droppings “caused obvious distress and upset to customers trying to eat, as well as staff members,” the Greater Manchester Police told BBC, earning the woman a fixed penalty notice and fine. Let’s just hope it’s big enough for her to give a sh*t.

H/T + Picthx Eater

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

This Elephant Dung Beer Serves Some Intense Butt-Brewing Action

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The only thing better than a $50 cup of elephant dung coffee is an even pricier glass of elephant dung beer. Because alcohol improves everything, right?

That’s the idea behind the Thailand specialty brew  Un, Kono Kuro, a dark stout that uses Thailand’s infamous elephant-processed coffee beans as a base for some really intense butt-brewing action. It works like this: workers at a Thai elephant sanctuary feed their elephants a crapload of coffee beans. Then the beans sit around in the elephants’ digestive system for awhile, absorbing all sorts of secondary flavors like banana and sugar cane (and, you know, elephant sh**) before being pooped out in giant caffeinated piles. Then really unlucky specially trained workers hand-pick the coffee beans out of the elephant dung, the beans get made into coffee, and the coffee gets made into beer. Then you drink it.

According to the brave folks over at RocketNews 24, the beer has “an initial bitterness […] washed over by a wave of sweetness,” which sounds pretty decent for a dark stout. We were almost sold until the reviewer started describing what he called ‘the afterglow’ by saying, “for some time after I could still feel as if my body was saturated with that warm scent.” Yeah. Any beer that saturates our body with the warm scent of elephant dung is probably not for us, but props to the brave folks who enjoy it (and to the elephant sanctuary that earns a profit on every butt-processed bean). We raise our glasses to you.

H/T + PicThx RocketNews24

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

So Feces Wine is a Real Thing and According to This Japanese Girl Group, It Tastes ‘Delicious’

Inside: poop, pretty girls and booze. Shh, just come.

A couple months ago, Japanese news site Rocket News 24 got their hands on some bottles of tsongsul, a traditional Korean “feces wine,” made by soaking chicken, dog or human feces in soju alcohol until the mixture ferments – by no means a popular drink, but nevertheless rumored to cure illness and heal bone fractures.

While the site did manage to get a few, ahem, shits and giggles out of the whole thing, it turned out that after the initial smell and taste test, no one in the office actually wanted to drink the stuff. So Rocket did the only thing it could: found a Japanese all-girl air-band and tricked them into drinking it.

They told the girls they’d be trying a new Korean herbal wine. This was some of their early feedback:

“Yum! I don’t like shochu but I can drink this! That’s impressive, you know! It has a refined and elegant taste similar to that of wine. The color is also pleasant, similar to that charming translucency of rosé. This is sure to be popular with young women!”

“It tastes like those old Japanese candies they used to sell at supermarkets! This is delicious! What’s this sweetness, I wonder… It’s like Yomeishu (a traditional Japanese herbal liqueur), but with a different kind of sweetness. This would be great for girls who like sweet alcoholic beverages. I’d drink this again!”

“Oh, wow! When I heard this was medicinal herb wine I thought it would taste strong, but I was completely off the mark. This is really good, and easy to drink. I think this could be a hit with girls.”

Of course, after the truth was divulged, the girls completely changed their imaginary-instrument-playing tunes and insisted the drink tasted like poop, but with such a drastic turn, it would seem the only way to know the true taste of tsongsul would be to try it for yourself.

Or you could, you know, do almost anything else and not seem so absolutely disgusting.

H/T and PicThx Rocket News 24