‘Milking’ Is Stupid, and a Horrible Waste of Milk

There’s an ignorant crack about British dental hygiene in here, but for the sake of journalistic integrity, I’ll refrain.

But seriously Britain, wot the bloody hell?

Joining the ranks of such tired web pranks as planking and owling, “milking” entails going out into a public space and pouring milk over your head as random passerby question your sanity. Never mind that it just looks stupid, what about all the dairy dishes you’ve now effectively barred yourself from having? Did you want some cereal for breakfast this morning? How about a homemade milkshake for dessert?

I guess you could do what the guy at 2:03 did and bring your bowl into the milk shower along with you, but I for one prefer my breakfasts hair and dumbass-free.

via HuffPo


7-Foot NBA Star Caught Planking in the Frozen Pizza Aisle

Oh, stop groaning — we all knew #planking wasn’t going to phase out without a fight. We encouraged it with our Food Planking series, and JaVale McGee, aka @JaValeMcGee34, aka Professional 7-foot NBA center for the Washington Wizards, has just upped the planking game by taking over his local supermarket. With the utmost planking quality form and lifelessness, he has appropriated himself in one of the most prestigious freezer compartments in one of the most prestigious aisles a supermarket has to offer — the frozen pizza area.  That’s 7-feet of freezer space. #planking



Food Planking

Food Planking — a branch of “the lying down game” or “planking,” a popular activity with origins dating back to 1997 that consists of lying face down in an unusual or incongruous location. When humans participate, it involves the hands touching the sides of the body, and having a photograph for memory.

Why leave food out of the equation? We’ve put together a gallery with a few initial food planks, but y’all are more than welcome to include your own in the comments! Enjoy: