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Hit-Or-Miss News

Swimsuit Competition Recreates ‘Last Supper’ Sparking Major Outrage

An annual swimsuit competition in Brazil, the Miss Bumbum Pageant, is facing some major heat from religious leaders this past week after the magazine recreated the iconic “Last Supper” painting with models in bikinis, reports Maxim.

Painted by Leonardo Da Vinci in the 15th Century, the work of art is considered one of history’s greatest religious masterpieces, depicting Jesus Christ’s last meal with his followers before his crucifixion. The newest take on that features eight models, in place of Christ and his disciples, wearing bikinis and posing ‘butts out’ to the camera.

Cacau Oliver, the pageant’s creator, told the Daily Mail that the biblical scenario was intended to recreate the tense atmosphere of the competition. Oliver went on to say that the photo took place during the “last” meeting of the women before heading into the grand finale of the competition.

Sexy Jesus herself, Daiana Fegueredo, issued a public apolgoy for the image. The model, pictured at the center of the piece, said she grew up Catholic and considers the photo blasphemy. Fegueredo says that ever since the shoot, she’s regretted being a part of the controversial image. She told the Daily Mail:

“We went too far. We were part of a great sin.”

The biggest sin, judging from the image, are the models sitting bare bottom on perfectly good food. Such as waste.

Categories
Fast Food

In-N-Out, as Explained by Cartoons, a Comedian, and Jesus Christ

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The cult of In-N-Out, to anyone who hasn’t yet been inducted into it, can seem a little insane. The lines are too long, the workers are too happy, the customization options are ridiculous, and why are there little religious verses everywhere?

Well, leave it to LA-based filmmaker and comedian Connor Kerrigan to come out and finally say what we’ve all been thinking. In a short animated clip, Kerrigan assays the ins and outs of the ironically named burger chain, from the number of cars in the drive-thru, even to how Jesus feels about the use of John 3:16 on the soda cups.

Spoilers: apparently even the Son of God isn’t safe from becoming an In-N-Out convert.

Check out the whole Monkey Style-fueled video below:

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Hit-Or-Miss

This Miracle Machine Promises to Turn Water into Wine

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You can probably thank the failed economy and the growing sentiment that wine-tasting is complete and utter bullshit for this one. Proving that the world is ready to move into the next stage of home-brewing, someone actually invented a machine that makes wine out of water.

It’s called The Miracle Machine (of course) and it’s basically a Sodastream for wine.  Like its under-21 counterpart, the Miracle Machine uses water, yeast, grape concentrate, and finishing powder packets to create decent DIY-quality vino, virtually out of thin air. Just connect the machine to its corresponding iOS or Android app, input all the ingredients, and, in true miracle fashion, wait three days for your wine to rise triumphantly from the ashes of discarded flavor packets and tap water.

There are currently six wine types programmed into the Miracle Machine App: Cabernet Sauvignon, Napa Chardonnay, Oregon Pinot Noir, a Tuscan blend, Sonoma Sauvignon Blanc, and a red and white (blend?) from Burgundy. Each type is expected to keep for up to one to two weeks and taste completely pre-aged and ready-to-drink.

Catch The Miracle Machine on its soon-to-launch Kickstarter page or watch the promotional video here.

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Hit-Or-Miss

Florida Woman Claims This Goldfish is Literally ‘Christ on a Cracker’

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We’ve all had our moments of appreciation for Goldfish cracker’s cheesy goodness, but one woman from Melbourne, Florida has taken Goldfish worship to the next level — by claiming her cracker is a sign from God.

Apparently, Melbourne resident Patti Burke was working her way through a bag of her favorite snacks when she noticed that one of the Goldfish crackers was just a little different, “He had a cross on him, and he had a crown circle up by his head. Something I’ve never seen before out of all the Goldfish I’ve eaten.”

Burke, who eats two to three pounds of Goldfish in an average week, knew that this cracker was special. “I believe it’s a sign, a sign from God,” she told reporters.

Since Goldfish manufacturer Pepperidge Farms has denied deliberately manufacturing the crossed cracker,  Burke’s salty revelation might in fact be proof of divine intervention. We’re a little doubtful that Goldfish would be the Lord’s cracker of choice — Saltines are certainly holier — but hey, we won’t bash anyone’s taste in sacred snack food. We’re just happy that (according to Burke) God loves our favorite cheddar-flavored munchies as much as we do.

H/T + PicThx Florida Today

Categories
Humor

The Last Supper, as Told Through Instagram

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It’s hard to imagine what dinner looked like before the days of Instagram, before the whole chef v. iPhone debate, before the whole genre of restaurant photography became this treacherous minefield of either annoying your fellow diners, or eschewing your right to document your dinner however well you damn please. It’s a tricky time to be a photo-foodie — which got us thinking, What Would Jesus Do (WWJD) in this situation? Or, to be more precise, WWJI?

We decided to take a crack at it, the results of which follow below.

Here’s our look at what The Last Supper, the last meal Jesus shared with His apostles before His crucifixion, might have looked like if it took place on Instagram, complete with #hashtags, emojis and yes, gratuitous, photo-ruining filters.

Sacrilege or vital (if narcissistic) historical documentation? You decide:

lastsupperfeed720

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Hit-Or-Miss

The Last Supper (In a Galaxy Far, Far Away…)

It is perhaps the most recognizable dinner scenes in all of history… and now there’s a Wookie in it. Personally, I think it makes the imagery all the more familiar.

This contemporary take on Leonardo da Vinci’s The Last Supper masterpiece features some striking similarities to the original work, while implementing some recognizable members of the Star Wars universe. The work features Luke Skywalker as the centerpiece in lieu of Christ, as well as some intergalactic bounty hunters, smugglers and droids carefully placed to evoke a similar feel to The Last Supper.

This particular piece of pop art is available for you to bring home on a snazzy new t-shirt for a nominal fee so you can sport this visual nerdgasm wherever you go.

($20 @ Etsy)

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Products

Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread Toaster

God has provided! This Daily Bread Toaster is sure to wipe away any sins you have. Repent and savor the savior of all holy toasts. ($29.95 @ Jesus Toasters)

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Hit-Or-Miss

British Man Finds Jesus…in Bacon Frying Pan?

A couple weeks back, a British man reportedly found Jesus Christ (an image of) in his bacon frying pan after he fell asleep while waiting for his bacon to cook. The 22-year-old fell asleep with bacon on the pan, only to be jolted an hour later by a room full of smoke. After turning off the heat, lifted up the bacon, he found the image of Jesus Christ looking back at him. Everything was visible, the eyes, nose and long hair and beard of Jesus. Toby (the British 22-year-old pictured above) said he will be keeping the pan in hopes it will watch over him. (Thx xinhau)