
This holiday, it’s easy to get caught up in the frills. Fireworks, grilling, the old red, white, and blue. But let’s not forget the true reason for the season, celebrating our liberation from our staunch, haggis-eating, tea-drinking forefathers. Think about it. If we hadn’t told GB to buzz off, we may have never created the Double Down. Girl Scout Cookies would only be eaten at tea time. French fries would be called chips and chips would be called crisps. Crisps!
So, this Independence Day, remember there’s plenty reason to revel in our independence, especially the fact that we didn’t get stuck eating that awful soggy grey stuff they call “food” on the other side of the pond. Sure Britain’s got its cool accents and nifty TV shows, but we’ll take a deep-fried twinkie over this mess any day:
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Pastry pie topped with fish heads
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Like unagi, only gross
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A pudding thing made from sheep heart, liver, and lungs
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A pudding sausage thing made from pig’s blood
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Warning: Made from human breast milk
PicThx Mother Nature Network
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Another pudding thing made with raisins; thankfully not diseased genitalia
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Seaweed thing?
PicThx Neil Cooks Grigson
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A boiled cake with a whole lemon inside. Why is it boiled?
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What looks like Britain’s version of Slim Jims, only a million times more frightening
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Yeast extract-based salty poop sauce
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Medley of last night’s leftover cabbage
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Unfortunately named offal meatballs
PicThx Lily In Canada
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Giant raisin newtons
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Not gross necessarily. Still sad looking though.
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Happy 4th of July everybody!

(CORRECTION 7/3/14: A previous version of this article listed Pickled Eggs as a British food. They are British in origin, but can also be found worldwide.)