Picture this: You’re in the middle of grocery shopping when you see a pack of red and white spotted Mario mushrooms just sitting there between the portabello and the buttons. Now I know what you’re thinking: “If I eat those, will I get bigger, gain more health or get super-fast?” Forget the fact that you had some mushrooms last night and there’s a good chance you’re imagining things. Just hurry up and grab them, before you step on another Goomba.
Wait, hang on, I think I’m confusing video games and reality again. That’s not a Goomba, that’s somebody’s kid. And these aren’t actual Mario mushrooms, they’re guerilla art designed by Toronto street artist Aiden Glynn and planted at his local grocery store. My bad.
Unfortunately, because we do live IRL, chances are consuming these won’t make you any bigger, healthier or faster than you already are. Unless of course it does. In which case, call me. I need friends who don’t think I’m nuts.