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Health News Packaged Food Products What's New

This Holiday Pie Granola is Delicious And Tackles Food Waste Issues

With the holiday season now beginning, all of the timely dessert-themed products are taking the market by storm. One product line, however, stands out from the rest.

Los Angeles-based startup Pulp Pantry has brought the holiday pie flavors into granola, with flavors like Apple Pie and Pumpkin Pie available to taste.

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What’s special about the granola from Pulp Pantry is that they are entirely plant-based and GRAIN FREE.

Instead of using traditional oats to make these festive granolas, CEO Kaitlin Mogentale sources pulps from LA-based juiceries like Suja to create her products. Almond pulp, apple pulp, and carrot pulp that would otherwise be discarded is converted into delicious, clean snacks like these granolas that are high in both fiber and protein.

Using pulps to create these products give Pulp Pantry an exciting and innovative angle in the granola world, as it provides huge flavor coupled with incredible nutrition. On top of that, it tackles the growing issue of food waste in this country – where 60 million tons of produce are tossed as food waste each year.

Pulp Pantry addresses this issue with the granolas, veggie crackers, and baking mixes that they sell online and in stores.

While the Apple Pie Granola is an original product, Pumpkin Pie is a new flavor created just in time for the holiday season.

You can head online to get these exciting, festive granolas, and also where the Pumpkin Pie flavor is sold exclusively. Pulp Pantry’s original flavors of granola can also be found across several stores in the Los Angeles area:

  • Erewhon
  • Renew Juicery
  • Livestyle Juice Bar
  • Grow DTLA
  • Grassroots Natural Market

We absolutely recommend heading to one of these stores (or online) to grab these granolas as a perfect holiday party snack or as a way to give your breakfast a holiday-themed, food-conscious twist!

Categories
Packaged Food

Nature Valley FINALLY Makes Infamously Hard Granola Bars Softer

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The last time we bit into a Nature Valley granola bar, we underestimated how hard it was. Heck, we even made a video about it. Turns out, Nature Valley knows how tough their product is and they’re softening it up.

After listening to customer complaints, the snack brand run by General Mills found a way to improve the classic Crunchy Granola Bar so that it’s easier to bite down on. Seriously, we were chipping teeth trying to get our granola fix.

With a few tweaks to the recipe, the new bars a softer and more bite-friendly.

Though we’ve yet to try it, anything improvements to the density of that granola bar is greatly appreciated. Now let’s all take a moment to honor all the teeth wounded in the pursuit of granola and nuts.

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Hit-Or-Miss

Grandma Finds Oats, Honey and COCAINE In Her Granola Bar

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One has certain expectations when opening a granola bar. Whether its nut-to-fruit ratio or granola dryness, these are all apppropriate thoughts when tearing into an energy bar.

“Hey, maybe I’ll find some cocaine,” is definitely not one of them. Yet here we are.

Cynthia Rodriguez of San Antonio opened a Nature Valley bar and allegedly found a bag filled with a white powdered substance, reports KEN5. The authorities first tested the substance for traces of heroin. It wasn’t heroin.

According to San Antonio police, the powder was a high-quality cocaine.

General Mills, the parent company of Nature Valley said in a statement that the cocaine didn’t come from the factory it was produced in.

Rodriguez is just glad that none of her 11 grandchildren were the ones to open the bar.

Photo: Ken5/Cynthia Rodriguez

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Fast Food

Dunkin’ Releases Coffee-Flavored Granola Bar to Pair With Your Coffee-Flavored Donuts … And Granola

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Coffee and donuts are ubiquitous, and coffee-flavored donuts are inspired, but sometimes you have to remember you’re not 15 anymore and you should probably start eating grown-up shit like herbal tea and granola bars.

Dunkin’ understands, which is (we think) why they’ve decided to create their new Dunkin’ Go granola bars. Made with seven grams of protein, eight B-vitamins, 12 grams of whole grains, and un-distilled essence of baby laughter, the things also taste like Dunkin’ Donuts coffee. You know, to help you forget you’re not drinking coffee, or if you are, remind you of your coffee addiction.

Dunkin’ Go Bars will be available starting next Monday the 29th at participating Dunkin’ locations. They’re also partnering with Wrigley Foodservice to make Orbit gum and Altoids available in stores, so you’ll have to blame something other than coffee for that morning breath.

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Jamba Juice Debuts New Energy Bowls, Basically Smoothies You Can Chew

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Jamba Juice is rolling out a new line of Energy Bowls that is sure to appease their regular smoothie loving customers. The new line up features revamped versions of old favorites, such as their Acai Bowls, as well as brand new options. The new Energy Bowls features a blend of whole fruits, soy milk, and greek yogurt topped with an assortment of toppings and fresh fruit. According to Brand Eating, the new menu currently offers six different bowls:

– Acai Berry Bowl – a blend of Acai (pronounced “ah-sah-ee”) juice, soymilk, strawberries, blueberries, and bananas, topped with fresh bananas, strawberries, and blueberries, plus sliced almonds and honey.

– Acai Primo Bowl – a blend of Acai juice, soymilk, bananas, strawberries, and blueberries, topped with organic granola, fresh bananas and blueberries, coconut, sliced almonds, and honey.

– Berry Bowl – a blend of Greek yogurt, soymilk, strawberries, blueberries, and bananas, topped with organic granola, fresh bananas and blueberries, and a mixed berry drizzle.

– Chunky Strawberry Bowl – a blend of Greek yogurt, strawberries, banana, peanut butter, and soymilk, topped with organic granola plus fresh banana and strawberries.

– Mango Peach Bowl – a blend of Greek yogurt, mangoes, peaches, bananas, and soymilk, topped with organic granola, fresh bananas, coconut, and a passion fruit drizzle.

– Tropical Acai Bowl – a blend of Acai juice, soymilk, mangoes, and peaches, topped with fresh pineapple and banana, plus sliced almonds and coconut.

In conjunction with the new menu’s launch, Jamba Juice is offering a coupon on their website for half off any Energy Bowl through September 22.

H/T + PicThx Brand Eating

Categories
Features

What 24 Pizzas From The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cartoon Look Like IRL

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As a kid, I loved watching the ’90s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon. Who didn’t? One of the things that stuck was all the ridiculous pizzas Michelangelo and his brothers would order throughout the series. As the years passed, I started to think some of those pizzas could actually be pretty delicious if done right. Though it did take a solid 22 years for anchovies to grow on me.

Like his Renaissance namesake, who would have thought Mikey was ahead of his time. Using some hunger-fueled imagination I recreated 24 of the most disgusting pizza orders from the TV show and turned them into something you could order at a restaurant. Cowabunga.

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Tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly

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Tuna ahi poke on top of a bed of seaweed salad and drizzled some hot, melted peanut butter and grape jelly on top. Went more for color than taste. Ending up tasting great so that worked itself out.

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Peanut butter and clams

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Drenched the pizza in a cajun peanut butter sauce with four fresh calms. The heat from the sauce really made the clams, no pun intended, pop. Crawfish for garnish.

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Peanut butter, avocado and extra pickles

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A bed of guacamole topped with avocado slices, melted peanut butter and some sweet dill pickle chips. This is actually a sandwich I make on many an occasion.

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Marshmallow and pepperoni

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Pepperoni and cheese pizza topped with roasted marshmallows. The marshmallows look like haunting little lifeboats on a sea of pepperoni.

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Marshmallow and asparagus

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Asparagus and cheese baked directly into the crust and topped with toasted mini marshmallows. Had to many different versions of this one before I settled on this. Couldn’t be happier.

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Guacamole and Marshmallow

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A generous heap of freshly made guacamole and topped with a single marshmallow lit on fire. Kids, don’t try this at home. Grownups, go nuts.

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Butterscotch, onions and anchovies

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Onion and anchovies caramelized in brown sugar and a butterscotch sauce. Tasted great but stunk up my kitchen like nobody’s business. Do turtles have nostrils?

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Tea and toast

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A buttered slice of toast on top of tomato sauce and sprinkled with tea leaves, parmesan cheese and more tomato sauce. The original concept for this had chunks of toast drenched in tea. NOT. APPETIZING.

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Chocolate sprinkles and clam sauce

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A cheese pizza made with a hearty clam sauce and chocolate sprinkles and garnished with green onions. Not easy to make clam sauce pop on a pizza. Had to tweak it into a chowder. Master Splinter would be proud.

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Chocolate-chip

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Chocolate chips baked into the pizza and drenched with a generous amount of hot fudge. It’s essentially a cookie.

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Chocolate fudge with extra garlic

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A generous amount of fried garlic on top of a pool of melted chocolate fudge. Definitely not something you’d order on a first date, but then again, are any of these pizzas?

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Chocolate fudge, sardine, chili pepper, whipped cream

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A cheese and whipped cream pizza topped with shaved chocolate fudge and red chili flakes. Served with a fried sardine filet in chocolate fudge sauce. Any nutrients that piece of sardine contains is neutralized by that mountain of whipped cream. I guarantee it.

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Anchovies and hot fudge

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Hot chocolate fudge drizzled over anchovy filets on a sauceless white pizza. Until the day anchovies turn into giant mutated fish that eat people, they’ll forever be my favorite fish.

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Pepperoni and hot fudge

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A classic pepperoni and cheese pizza drizzled with a little chocolate fudge. Just a little. We’re not animals.

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Pepperoni and pickles

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Cheese and pepperoni pizza with sweet dill pickle chips. The pickles add a crunch that can be heard all through the New York sewer systems.

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Jelly bean and sausage

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A spicy pork chorizo and sour cream pizza topped with queso fresco and fresh cilantro and served with a jalapeño jellybean gastrique. The jelly beans had us stumped but luckily Reddit came to the rescue.

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Salami pizza with double yogurt

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Two servings of vanilla yogurt topped with fresh salami slices and drizzled with blackberry jelly. If you can get over the idea of salami and yogurt, it goes down pretty tastily.

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Shredded coconut and sweet pickles

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Pizza is topped with shredded coconut, drizzled with hot mustard and topped with sweet pickle chips. Shredder would be a crazy handy guy to have in this situation.

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Strawberry with anchovy sauce

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Caramelized strawberries served with an anchovy butter sauce and topped with whipped cream. This one was the most difficult to come up with. Thankfully, whipped cream saved the day.

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Hot oatmeal

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Hot, buttery oatmeal topped with brown sugar, honey and fresh strawberries. It’s another side to breakfast pizza.

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Popcorn

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Truffle oil popcorn with parsley flakes and parmesan cheese. There’s a pizza somewhere under that mountain of popcorn.

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Anchovies and banana

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Caramelized rum bananas and anchovy filets. The pizza that inspired this post. The bananas and anchovies were the perfect balance of sweet and salty.

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Goulash

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Hot goulash served with crumbles of queso fresco. After a quick Google search of what exactly goulash was, it was pretty easy to make.

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Granola and licorice 

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Vanilla yogurt topped with granola and shaved red licorice. It was a bitch to hand shred licorice, but doesn’t it look pretty?

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Video for verification

Categories
Packaged Food

Cheerios to Target Even More Silly Grown-Ups with New Cheerios Protein

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In today’s edition of dated brands fighting to remain commercially relevant, Cheerios hopes to recapture the growing health-conscious adult market with two new protein-boosted cereals.

Available in Cheerios Protein Oats & Honey and Cheerios Protein Cinnamon Almond, new Cheetos Protein combine Cheerio O’s with oat granola and honey and almond granola and cinnamon, respectively. Each also contains 11 grams of protein before milk, or 7 grams more than regular Cheerios.

“Parents are looking for breakfast options that not only provide long-lasting energy, but also something their entire family will enjoy at times that are right for them,” said Cheerios senior marketing manager Matt McQuinn in a press release.

Of course, the Wall Street Journal notes that most meat-eating Americans eat more than the daily recommended amount of protein anyhow, but hey, if you can get the horse to drink.

Categories
Packaged Food

Apparently, Sexy Granola Will Make You Better At Sex

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At least according to the manufacturers of SEXCEREAL, a new granola-based breakfast cereal claiming to improve the sexual experiences of both men and women with each seed-packed swallow.

The cereal comes in two separately-gendered versions (men get a mixture containing bee pollen and wheat germ, women get ginger and sunflower seeds) and claims that the differently calibrated cereals will fill a gaping hole in the breakfast food industry by providing something “sexy and fun.”

Props to cereal creator Peter Ehrlich for doing his best to make sexy granola a thing, but we’re pretty sure that anyone who relies on eating bags of bee pollen or ginger to save their sex life is in need of more than a cereal intervention.

SexCereal $20 @SexCereal

H/T + PicThx Incredible Things