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Slide Whistle Straws Let You Drink Like a Cartoon Character

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There’s an old episode of Spongebob Squarepants in which Spongebob, Patrick, and Squidward get their hands on some slide whistles and proceed to add inappropriate sound effects to EVERYTHING in Bikini Bottom — from automatic doors opening to lover’s quarrels. While we don’t recommend being that insufferable, these “Wet My Whistle” straws from Fred & Friends could add some much needed entertainment to an otherwise joyless drinking experience.

Slide whistle when your buddy gets turned down by a girl at the bar. Slide whistle to cover unpleasant vomiting sounds. Slide whistle just to slide whistle, because you and your friends are drunk and no one will remember how annoying you’re being anyway. The “slide” works by pulling the straw in and out of liquid as you blow, providing the perfect excuse to keep drinking — or the perfect excuse for the bartender to cut you off early.

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Wet My Whistle Musical Straws, available soon for $9.99 @Fred & Friends

H/T Incredible Things

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Saltside Out

Think outside the shaker. Sometimes it’s good to shake up expectations, especially at the dinner table. Take Fred & Friends new SaltSide Out for example, it defies logic by dispensing salt from the outside! Made of handblown borosilicate glass with a silicone stopper. (Thx Worldwidefred)

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Fossiliced Ice Trays

‘Ice for any age. Need to dig up a clever party accessory? Look no further than our ice-cold fossils – these two assorted dinos will add the perfect Ice Age touch to your modern drinks. Snappy recyclable clear box.’ (Thx Worldwidefred)

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Tipsy Toes

‘Add a little kick to your cocktail! Tipsy Toes are stylish, freezable ice cubes that won’t dilute your drink and can be used over and over. Put a pair in your punch, or dip your toes into a gin and tonic. Tipsy Toes are food-safe, filled with pure distilled water, and packed six per clear peggable package’.

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Lit Candles

Happy Doobie to You! Time to roll out another birthday? Celebrate in style with Worldwidefred’s Lit birthday candles. Eight perfectly rolled candles in each clear plastic peggable pack. Check more for full view.

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PAC-MAN HOTHEAD

He’s a mouth with a new mission. Pac-Man is back, and he’s ready to gobble up your hot pots and pans! Fred’s newest all-silicone HotHead is happy to hang out in your kitchen and bring back fond memories of your many misspent hours at the game console. Score! (Thx Fred & Friends)