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Features Video

7 Times Seafood Made Us Terrified To Go In The Water

The ocean can be a terrifying place. In the vast depths, the denizens that dwell beneath can sometimes be even more terrifying.

We dug around and found seven instances where seafood has simply made us fear the water.

So the next time you enjoy your fresh seafood platter, take a second to appreciate the work it took to get your food plated in front of you. As you can see from the seven tales presented below, you can bet your seafood put up a fight.


Spider Crabs Molting

Watching a creature molt and casting aside its current shell for a stronger skin, can make a person uneasy. Now imagine if you were exploring undersea life and come across THOUSANDS of these vicious spider crabs molting at the same time. Makes you want to rethink the crab fest at your local crab shack, right?

Eel Man

While the only tale that doesn’t take place in the water, it still makes us fear a bare-bottom encounter with a live eel. This dude in Asia decided it was a good idea to put a live eel up his butt to help clear out his constipation. The terrified eel did some damage to the man’s stomach and had to be removed through surgery after it died.

Yikes.

The takeaway from all of this? Eat more fiber.

Shrimp v Dragon Fish

When’s the last time you had some fresh shrimp and fish ceviche? Well if you never want to see how the sausage is made, you’ll definitely want to steer clear of this video.

OK, this isn’t really how ceviche is made. It is, however, a graphic video of a shrimp tearing open the stomach of a dragon fish to pull out an even SMALLER fish. A cut scene straight out of Mortal Kombat, this is definitely not for the faint of heart.

Hungry Clams Beach

Imagine you’re chilling at the beach and thousands of hungry clams emerge from the sand like a scene straight out of a horror movie? This terrifying footage captures exactly that.

A haunting sight for some, and the freshest seafood buffet for others. It’s all about perspective.

Spider Crabs Tearing Apart Octopus

This octopus was going about its day, heading home from a long day of flipping algae burgers, when it was confronted by a cast of crabs. Spider crabs to be exact.

The cast of crustaceans tear this innocent octopus apart, making short work of the cephalopod mollusk. Check out the brutal video at your own risk.

Clam Digging

Footage of this peculiar clam tunneling its way into the sand may appear whimsical at first. However, imagine if this were the reverse. You’re standing on the shore, barefoot, when a giant clam digs its way out of the sand like a scene straight out of Tremors.

Not so cute, huh?

As Foodbeast’s resident man of science Constantine Spyrou would say:

I ain’t saying she’s a clam digger.

Jimmy Johns Man

Sometimes the greatest sea monster isn’t from the sea. Such was the case with this guy that strongly resembled Jimmy Johns’ founder Jimmy John Liataud who had a photo go viral where he was allegedly shown humping a dead shark.

Not the proudest moment for land lubbers, that’s for sure.

We later found that it wasn’t actually Liataud, but an NYC police officer named Shawn.

Stay classy, officer.

Categories
Animals Tastemade/Snapchat

10 Shellfish Facts That You Probably Didn’t Know

Shellfish thrive as intriguing little weirdos who look like tiny versions of the creatures that once tried to take out Godzilla in old monster flicks. But what do you really know about them, aside from their ability to be a celebrated main ingredient of coastal dives? Let’s take a closer look at these shelled invertebrates that swim, float, and live under the sea.

 

Lobsters taste with their legs and chew with their stomachs

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The leg and feet hairs of a lobster are chemosensory, and they use their antennas to track down possible food. They’re also fitted with a gastric mill, essentially a set of teeth in their stomachs, located behind their eyes.

 

Oysters can and will change their sex

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All oysters are born male and will swap genders at least once. Given that they are born with both sets of reproductive organs, oysters can also fertilize their own eggs.

 

A sea urchin’s mouth is known as “Aristotle’s Lantern”

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Located on the underside of a sea urchin’s body, their unique, complex mouth has five sharp teeth that can drill a hole into a rock. These chompers can also be venomous, so watch out on the beach and at your favorite sushi bar.

 

Lobsters are sometimes cannibals

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Lobsters have eaten each other when in the same cage, as though in some type of underwater Thunderdome, but they now seem to be doing it in the wild as well. Typical cases involve adults eating their young.

 

The phrase “happy as a clam” is incomplete

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The longer version of the term is “as happy as a clam at high water,” though it’s rarely used. The idiom makes more sense in full because a clam at high tide is typically free from predators.

 

Crabs communicate by the sound of their claws and pincers

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Crabs create sounds by drumming and flapping their sharp appendages in what can only be described as crustacean Morse code. Some species of crab have one especially large claw used for communication.

 

Lobsters pee out of their faces, especially when they want blood or sex

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Lobsters’ antennal glands are the greenish-brown spots near the antennae, and it’s custom for them to pee at each other during battle or courtship. The female, who makes the first move, pees in a male’s shelter several times, creating a pheromonal state of relaxation for the male.

 

One shrimp can lay a million eggs

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In a single season, a female shrimp will produce an absurd amount of offspring, which will hatch in two weeks’ time. They can also survive in any water conditions as long as there’s food, so a breeding area can be pretty much anywhere.

 

Lobsters used to be served to prisoners who absolutely hated it

Back in colonial times, in a stunning comparison to their high-brow status these days, lobsters were constantly fed to prisoners (and slaves). They were cheap, omnipresent, and gross. Prisoners got so sick of eating lobster that a rule to reduce their serving to only three days a week was enforced.

 

The mantis shrimp kills its prey in the craziest, most brutal way imaginable

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The mantis shrimp dismembers other shellfish with its two appendages that carry the same velocity of a rifle gunshot — moving so quickly that they boil the water around them, ultimately creating a shockwave that can also kill prey. To put that into perspective, if a human had utilized that same force in their arms, they would be able to throw a rock into outer space! Not only that, but their shell is so intense that it’s inspired actual human body armor.

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Hit-Or-Miss

Watching Hungry Clams Emerge From The Beach Is Absolutely Haunting

I’m naive to clams.

I eat them in hordes when available, in pasta and on pizzas whenever the chance presents itself, but never have I thought about them as living beings with eating needs like the rest of us. Not until today, stumbling across a nondescript video uploaded in 2012 of a wave calmly washing over a sandy beach, only to leave behind an incentive for thousands of clams to poke up through the surface and begin feeding.

The experience, I’m sure only exasperated in person, is equal parts haunting and gratifying. Eat on clams. Eat on:

Categories
Features

What 24 Pizzas From The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cartoon Look Like IRL

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As a kid, I loved watching the ’90s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon. Who didn’t? One of the things that stuck was all the ridiculous pizzas Michelangelo and his brothers would order throughout the series. As the years passed, I started to think some of those pizzas could actually be pretty delicious if done right. Though it did take a solid 22 years for anchovies to grow on me.

Like his Renaissance namesake, who would have thought Mikey was ahead of his time. Using some hunger-fueled imagination I recreated 24 of the most disgusting pizza orders from the TV show and turned them into something you could order at a restaurant. Cowabunga.

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Tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly

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Tuna ahi poke on top of a bed of seaweed salad and drizzled some hot, melted peanut butter and grape jelly on top. Went more for color than taste. Ending up tasting great so that worked itself out.

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Peanut butter and clams

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Drenched the pizza in a cajun peanut butter sauce with four fresh calms. The heat from the sauce really made the clams, no pun intended, pop. Crawfish for garnish.

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Peanut butter, avocado and extra pickles

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A bed of guacamole topped with avocado slices, melted peanut butter and some sweet dill pickle chips. This is actually a sandwich I make on many an occasion.

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Marshmallow and pepperoni

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Pepperoni and cheese pizza topped with roasted marshmallows. The marshmallows look like haunting little lifeboats on a sea of pepperoni.

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Marshmallow and asparagus

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Asparagus and cheese baked directly into the crust and topped with toasted mini marshmallows. Had to many different versions of this one before I settled on this. Couldn’t be happier.

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Guacamole and Marshmallow

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A generous heap of freshly made guacamole and topped with a single marshmallow lit on fire. Kids, don’t try this at home. Grownups, go nuts.

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Butterscotch, onions and anchovies

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Onion and anchovies caramelized in brown sugar and a butterscotch sauce. Tasted great but stunk up my kitchen like nobody’s business. Do turtles have nostrils?

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Tea and toast

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A buttered slice of toast on top of tomato sauce and sprinkled with tea leaves, parmesan cheese and more tomato sauce. The original concept for this had chunks of toast drenched in tea. NOT. APPETIZING.

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Chocolate sprinkles and clam sauce

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A cheese pizza made with a hearty clam sauce and chocolate sprinkles and garnished with green onions. Not easy to make clam sauce pop on a pizza. Had to tweak it into a chowder. Master Splinter would be proud.

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Chocolate-chip

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Chocolate chips baked into the pizza and drenched with a generous amount of hot fudge. It’s essentially a cookie.

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Chocolate fudge with extra garlic

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A generous amount of fried garlic on top of a pool of melted chocolate fudge. Definitely not something you’d order on a first date, but then again, are any of these pizzas?

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Chocolate fudge, sardine, chili pepper, whipped cream

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A cheese and whipped cream pizza topped with shaved chocolate fudge and red chili flakes. Served with a fried sardine filet in chocolate fudge sauce. Any nutrients that piece of sardine contains is neutralized by that mountain of whipped cream. I guarantee it.

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Anchovies and hot fudge

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Hot chocolate fudge drizzled over anchovy filets on a sauceless white pizza. Until the day anchovies turn into giant mutated fish that eat people, they’ll forever be my favorite fish.

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Pepperoni and hot fudge

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A classic pepperoni and cheese pizza drizzled with a little chocolate fudge. Just a little. We’re not animals.

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Pepperoni and pickles

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Cheese and pepperoni pizza with sweet dill pickle chips. The pickles add a crunch that can be heard all through the New York sewer systems.

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Jelly bean and sausage

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A spicy pork chorizo and sour cream pizza topped with queso fresco and fresh cilantro and served with a jalapeño jellybean gastrique. The jelly beans had us stumped but luckily Reddit came to the rescue.

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Salami pizza with double yogurt

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Two servings of vanilla yogurt topped with fresh salami slices and drizzled with blackberry jelly. If you can get over the idea of salami and yogurt, it goes down pretty tastily.

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Shredded coconut and sweet pickles

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Pizza is topped with shredded coconut, drizzled with hot mustard and topped with sweet pickle chips. Shredder would be a crazy handy guy to have in this situation.

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Strawberry with anchovy sauce

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Caramelized strawberries served with an anchovy butter sauce and topped with whipped cream. This one was the most difficult to come up with. Thankfully, whipped cream saved the day.

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Hot oatmeal

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Hot, buttery oatmeal topped with brown sugar, honey and fresh strawberries. It’s another side to breakfast pizza.

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Popcorn

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Truffle oil popcorn with parsley flakes and parmesan cheese. There’s a pizza somewhere under that mountain of popcorn.

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Anchovies and banana

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Caramelized rum bananas and anchovy filets. The pizza that inspired this post. The bananas and anchovies were the perfect balance of sweet and salty.

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Goulash

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Hot goulash served with crumbles of queso fresco. After a quick Google search of what exactly goulash was, it was pretty easy to make.

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Granola and licorice 

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Vanilla yogurt topped with granola and shaved red licorice. It was a bitch to hand shred licorice, but doesn’t it look pretty?

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Video for verification

Categories
Adventures

Adventure: Claws (Garden Grove)

For almost a year now, Elie has been raving about Claws in Garden Grove off of Brookhurst Avenue. He even covered it for FoodBeast in the past, but we wanted to make a new trip with the whole crew! We had oysters and cajun fries and shrimp, and spicy crawfish. Definitely one of the best messy meals I’ve ever had. Somehow I kept my hands clean enough to shoot photos on my iPhone after my camera battery died, which you can see after the jump. Then when you’re done viewing them and you’re drooling, head on over there for yourself.

Categories
Adventures

Thai Gulf: Huntington Beach

A little while before the newest version of our site was released, myself, Elie and Rudeluv (RDesigns) hit up Thai Gulf in Huntington Beach for a quick business meeting. This spot is definitely on point with unlimited chai tea, rice and soup and great quality meats and sea foods. Check the pictures after the jump to see what we got into.

Categories
News

Carrows $6.99 Two-Course Meals

The ubiquitious question still stands, “Are you hungry?!” The good folks at Carrows responded whole-heartedly, by presenting everyone with its new $6.99 Two-Course Meals. You get the option of choosing from an awesome array of main entrées and either an appetizer or dessert.

For the appetizers, your selection includes: side caesar salad, fresh dinner salad, soup of the day, green chile & jack quesadilla, cheese fries, onion rings, mini hot fudge sundae, Just Right Slice Pumpkin Pie (1/2 slice), Just Right Slice Apple Pie (1/2 slice) and for your entrées: BBQ Ranch Chicken Sliders (with golden French fries), Italian Sausage Pasta with Marinara Sauce, Three-Cheese Chicken Macaroni.

If all this has yet to make you feel “baller”, then for two dollars extra you can upgrade and get either Salisbury Steak Stack (with a mound of real mashed potatoes) or Shrimp & Clams Fry (with golden French fries). Step your game up at a Carrows near you, today!