Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Ice Cream Man Treats, Ranked

ice_cream_man_1

Photo: Phil Roeder

The ice cream men of America serve up a lot of goods, but these are the best.

5. Strawberry Shortcake Bar

ice_cream_man_2

This shot was taken seconds before there was none left to share. Photo: Richard Audet

As a kid, any flavor that’s not chocolate or vanilla can be inherently considered “exotic.” Strawberry is every child’s first foray into the unknown. The Strawberry Shortcake bar in particular is like creme brûlée for children. It has flavor, it has pizzazz, and it also feels kind of oddly healthy. It’s what kids think rich adults eat, so it’s what they order when trying to prove to their crushes they’re mature class-acts who’ll one day drive Ferraris.

4. Chocolate Eclair

This is a well-earned treat, sporting three different layers of immaculate wonder for your tastebuds. It wasn’t always your go-to, but when you get it, that first bite feels earned. You stand with your hands on your hips, scouting the board and seeing your go-tos, your favorites, but then you let out a, “You know –,” and decide to play a wildcard by ordering it and feeling a little different that day; just a bit cooler, just a bit more unpredictable, and very satisfied.

3. Drumstick

ice_cream_man_3

If you have a nut allergy, nothing to see here! Photo: Denise Krebs

The most universal treat in the ice cream man’s magical box, Drumsticks have never let anybody down. It’s the one thing on summer blocks all kids can agree on. At worst, you get a pleasant shrug if, for some reason, the most exciting items (all those smashed rainbow-colored treats) are out of stock. Drumsticks are a classic. They’re the Chuck Taylor All-Stars of dessert. Everyone gets it, even if it’s not all, or even most of the time.

2. Chipwich

ice_cream_man_4

You’re not going to find this sandwich at a Subway. Photo: Varin

It’s a masterful, sassy move; a mic drop on the dessert world. Before you order one you find yourself asking, “Would it be considered too much, too ostentatious, too ‘in your face?’” But then somebody decided doors were meant to be kicked in and the revolutionary item became a masterpiece standard. Now, it seems so foolish to have ever lived in a world where ice cream sandwiches weren’t napping luxurious between chocolate chip cookies.

1. Choco Taco

ice_cream_man_5

This one gets extra points for rhyming. Photo: Stephanie “veganlazysmurf”

Long before hybrid foods became all the rage (e.g. cronuts, cake pops, ramen burgers, bacon-infused / wrapped / flavored everything else), there was one item in existence that dared to go the wild distance. The Choco Taco took two of mankind’s greatest inventions, the taco and ice cream, and put them together so seamlessly, it’s hard to imagine how Baby Boomers and the Silent Generation spent their youth before the Choco Taco’s glorious Reagan-era launch. Did they watch the moon landing and wonder, how do we have the technology for this but not an even split of dairy treat and cone when biting into dessert?

Honorable mention: Any character with bubble gum eyes

ice_cream_man_6

I love your face. Photo: Kim Woodbridge

Like a gorgeous babe or strapping hunk, it looks amazing, sure, but you’ll always wind up heartbroken in the end. No matter how many times you’ve gone through this before, hoping it’ll turn out differently, those chewy eyes always taste like crap.

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Choco Taco Cappuccino Spotted at a Gas Station

choco-ccino

Once upon a time, a taco-shaped, chocolate-covered waffle cone fell in love with a cup of coffee, and wanted to be together so much that it eventually melted and died. And thus, the Choco Taco Cappuccino was born.

Okay, so maybe the real story isn’t that tragic, but that doesn’t make this epic combination of dessert and caffeine any less legendary. Spotted at a gas station in Lake Placid, New York, the Choco Taco Cappuccino is described as a “delicious blend of vanilla ice cream flavor, milk chocolate, dark fudge, and peanuts.” Yeah, in a cup.

Our advice? Ditch the creamer for this bad boy and toss in half an actual Choco Taco instead, or use the Choco Taco as some kind of oversized biscotti. WAAAAAANT.

H/T Grubstreet, Pichx Bedford + Bowery

Categories
Packaged Food

DIY Choco Tacos from Taco Bell – Ice Cream Sadly Not Included

chocotaco1

Why do we eat fast food? Chances are, because we’re broke and too lazy to cook ourselves. Now, to be fair, scooping ice cream chunks into pre-made taco shells can’t strictly be classified as “cooking,” but part of me wishes good ol’ T-Bell would just bring back the in-store Choco Taco and stop asking people to do things for themselves.

First spotted back in August, Taco Bell is apparently selling do-it-yourself dessert kits at Wal-Mart. Available in “Chocolate Taco” and “Cinnamon Nachos,” the $3 kits come with almost everything you need to be an enterprising fattie: chocolate-flavored corn taco shells, chocolate sauce and sprinkles for the Choco Taco, and cinnamon tortilla chips, caramel and toffee bits for the nachos. The ice cream, unfortunately, you’ll have to pony up another $3 or so for, sigh.

chocotaco2

Marvo from The Impulse Buy reports the shells are pretty fragile, and most people will probably wind up eating chocolate nachos rather than chocolate tacos by the end of their endeavors. We haven’t had the chance to try them yet, but “fragile ice cream receptacles” seems like a pretty solid (heh) reason not to.

Just think, if you know the quality’s going to suck anyway, wouldn’t you rather outsource the labor?

Taco Bell Chocolate Taco Dessert Kit: $14.99 @ Amazon

Taco Bell Cinnamon Nacho Dessert Kit: $5.99 @ Amazon (for some reason)

H/T Consumerist + PicThx Impulsive Buy

Categories
Sweets

Dairy Queen Worker Creates DIY Waffle Cone Blizzard Taco

waffle-ice-cream-taco

Reddit user ILikeWhereThisIsGoin is a bona fide genius. “ILike,” an employee at Dairy Queen, created his own version of the Choco Taco using DQ’s thick waffle cone shell filled with their mint chocolate soft-serve blizzard drizzled in chocolate sauce. As one commentator pointed out, “I would passionately shove bananas in that.” Yes, our sentiments exactly.

It should be noted that prior to writing this post I was considering grabbing a sensible breakfast bagel around the corner. However, as soon as I laid eyes on this indulgent beauty, I promptly grabbed an ice cream bar out of the office fridge to satisfy my sudden appetite for a chilly dessert. Hey, can you blame me?

Heads up, DQ Headquarters, ILike is a lowkey mastermind. We recommend promoting this fellow before Taco Bell snatches him up to create the DLT version of desserts. Ice cream-flavored waffle cones anyone?

choco-taco

H/T Reddit + PicThx ILikeWhereThisIsGoin

Categories
Cravings

If Choco Tacos Were Savory, They Might Look Like These Coffee-Rubbed Pork Tacos

It’s a bored recipe hunter’s wet dream. Imagine coffee-rubbed pork tenderloin on a warm bed of homemade chocolate corn tortillas.

The dish comes by way of Stef, who runs her own blog that’s definitely worth a bookmark: The Cupcake Project. As evidenced by the title, Stef traditionally lends her talents to the more sweet side of the recipe spectrum, but her sweet play on tacos is one to gawk at.

The pork tenderloin maintains its juicyness with a prominent coffee flavor, but accented with a hint of cayenne pepper, cumin, cinnamon, garlic powder and onion powder.

She notes in her recipe that the slight sweetness of the chocolate in the tortilla works as a fitting complement to the pork.

The title Choco Taco comparison may be unfounded, but sue me, you wouldn’t garnish your ice cream sundae with a cherry tomato, would you?

Categories
Cravings

Craving: Homemade Choco Taco

It’s morning right now, and while I sip on my coffee I can’t help but wonder how good this would taste as a side dish. You can learn how to make it over at SeriousEats.