Categories
Alcohol Beer Culture Opinion

Breweries Are Not A Playpen, Stop Bringing Your Kids

Though I haven’t been drinking for long, I’ve come to know a thing or two about bars and breweries. One thing everyone accepts is that you must be 21 or older to enter. Unless you’re a child, that is.

Look, I get that this might come off as arrogant or exclusionary, but with breweries on the rise in the last few years, it’s becoming a little ridiculous when every time I go to one I’m invariably met with a toddler scurrying about my feet or a toy patiently waiting for someone to step on it.

These instances aren’t rare. “I walked into a brewery with a group of 10 to 12 children running around outside, with waiters dodging them. It was like daddy day care out there. It looked like lazy parenting,” said Foodbeast Managing Editor, Reach Guinto.

Kids get me and I get them, I know they just want to eat and play. Who the hell doesn’t want that everyday? But look kid, I just worked eight hours and half of that pay is going to bills and the other half is going right down my throat with these few flights of beers.

I walk into a brewery with the mindset of shooting the shit with some friends and casually getting day drunk and hoping nobody notices.

Now I’m not saying to ban babies from breweries — the alliteration is nice, sure — but that’s a terrible sentiment. However, there should be some rule or guideline that a parent should consider when visiting a local brewery.

I get that a babysitter will cost a dumb amount for a few hours and as a parent you need some time to chill out with friends and have a beer and go out sometimes. That’s perfectly fine. But after a certain hour there’s a time when a brewery becomes bar-like and a baby’s presence seems, for lack of a better term, weird.

I’m not the only one that shares this sentiment.


Around 7pm is right when a brewery takes on the vibe of a bar, that’s the beauty of a brewery. It’s the feeling of having drinks and being social but not having to pay $30 for two cocktails and hear, for the millionth time, how terrible our political climate is.

Although a fair point to bring up by parents is that it’s a great way to introduce children to casual drinking at an early age, I hardly doubt that little Tommy is going to grow up a better person because you brought him to a brewery. Kids don’t care where they are, they aren’t socially aware of what is going on. You could be drinking turpentine for all they care.

The general climate around children at a brewery isn’t hostile in the least bit. Most people will try to ignore the child or even play with them, it’s a mixed bag when it comes to these crowds. But generally speaking, people find drinking and smoking a little less enjoyable while a child is present, and for good reason.

A normal patron won’t say anything negative about the children there, that’s why it’s up to the establishments to figure out the best way to go about this minor dilemma.

This problem could be solved relatively easily. There’s no doubt that there are some breweries that have a vibe children can play and relax at, then there are some that aren’t so flexible.

Take Golden Road Brewing in Anaheim, CA for example, a perfect place to bring a kid right after a game at Angel’s Stadium. They’ve got cornhole, a great outdoor play area for kids, and an awesome menu that caters to children.

But Ballast Point at night? With the condensed crowds overlooking the ocean, a very specific menu, and no play area, that kid might end up in the ocean.

If these two breweries advertised some sort of “children’s hours,” or something that would more outwardly show how equipped they are to handle the toddler crowd, then us thirsty patrons can plan ahead. Maybe take it easy in the afternoon at Golden Road, play some cornhole, then head to Ballast Point and forget everything we came with.

Drinking is a simple thing really, but it’s also sacred. Any disturbance in the force is felt with great magnitude.

It’s 7pm, hide yo kids and lemme drink.

Categories
Celebrity Grub Humor

How Gordon Ramsay Deals With Kids vs Adults Is Drastically Different [WATCH]

Gordon Ramsay has built a reputation of mercilessly ripping into the chefs on his shows like he’s dissing Meek Mill, but when it comes to kids, he seems to have a soft spot in his heart.

A comparison video was posted to YouTube by motboltz, that showed the two extremes between the way Ramsay talks to adults and the way he talks to child chefs.

For example, when talking to adult chefs, he has no problem with saying things like, “You, you, you, you, F*CK OFF OUT OF HERE!” or the classic, “Listen, listen, listen, listen. F*ck off! F*ck off! F*ck off! F*ck off!”

Now when dealing with children, it’s a complete 180, as he’ll sometimes even plead with the children not to get upset. “Don’t worry. Look, I’m here to help you. Please don’t get upset,” Ramsay has been recorded saying on his show Masterchef Junior.

Ramsay even hugs the kids!

It’s really kind of crazy that it’s the same person running both shows, as he’ll unleash his ginger anger to grown ups, then be the sweetest angel when dealing with kids.

One thing’s for sure, whether he’s singing Kumbaya with the kids or telling adults that they’re “sh*t cooks,” we’re going to watch the hell out of it and eat it all up, because Ramsay’s a god.

Categories
Culture Video

Watch American Kids Try Japanese Food For The First Time

Japanese food is definitely one of our go-to dinner choices after a long day at work. While the thought of a Japanese dinner leaves our mouths salivating, there are a ton of people who haven’t tried the cuisine before.

WatchCut Video‘s latest video has a bunch of American kids trying Japanese food for the first time in their young lives.

The dishes featured included: miso soup, Natto Gohan (fermented soybeans), sashimi (raw fish), daikon (pickled radish), umeboshi (pickled plums), Udon noodles, shrimp tempura, and Oshiruko (red bean soup & mochi).

While a savory feast for those familiar, these dishes can often come off as strange and off-putting to children unfamiliar with the cuisine. Still, props to these kids for giving the food a fair shake. Plus, there’s a hilarious B Plot where no one can figure out how to use the chopsticks.

Check out the adorable video and see if you can pass up some Japanese food for dinner.

Categories
Products

Lego Shot Glasses Worth Stubbing Your Foot For

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There’s a reason they give Legos to children, and not drunken adults. Sure, both are highly irresponsible and likely to lose the tiny, colorful building blocks, or try to eat them, or use them in any fashion other than the recommended play. But at least children are resilient. If they hurt themselves stepping barefoot on a Lego, they’ll be able to bounce back. If a drunken adult does it, well, have you ever wondered what it might feel like to be hungover in your head and your foot?

Not like that’ll stop us from using these Lego shot glasses though. New from Think Geek, these Build-On Brick Shot Glasses are perfectly compatible with regular Lego pieces, allowing kidults everywhere to indulge in as much Lego-themed debauchery as they please. (Think: sticking little Lego men on the side of the glass or trying to build a whole city in under an hour.) Especially crafty drinkers might even attempt to build flat Lego slippers to guard against the inevitable plastic shrapnel that’ll wind up in their carpets the next morning. For everyone else, it was nice knowing your feet?

lego2

Build on Brick Shot Glasses: set of 4 for $20 @ Think Geek

H/T Design Taxi

Categories
Fast Food

Definitely Lovin’ It: McDonald’s UK to Give Away Books Instead of Toys for Its Happy Meals

happymeal

Here’s a confession: It’s always been a naïve belief of mine that my future children will learn how to read before they ever watch television. Granted, I also hope to make a living as a writer (ha), but thanks to McDonald’s new pro-literacy Happy Meal campaign, all I need to do is to move to England and I’m almost halfway there.