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This Ridiculous Bib Table for Two Will Force You to Actually Look at Your Date

napkin table

Aziz Ansari said it best: the idea of marriage is insane. Two people who enjoy hanging out decide they’re only going to hang out with each other until they die, and they go around wearing metal circles on their fingers so everyone else is aware of the arrangement. If, however, the idea of utter codependence still strikes you as romantic, here’s a little invention designed to make outdoor picnics even easier/more difficult than they already are.

In the spirit of keeping oneself tethered to another human being, graduates of the Tunghai University school of design in Taiwan created the “Napkin Table,” a portable table you can carry around like a tote purse and tie around one other’s necks like bibs. The point is to provide an easily accessible surface complete with cup-holders and utensil pockets as well as “improve the relationship between two people eating together,” writes PSFK.

Call me a commitment-phobe, but I like having the freedom to look or not look at my date whenever I please. I also don’t appreciate having someone stare at me as I scarf down my grilled cheese. Ugh, could you please just go play Candy Crush or something?

Picthx PSFK

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Hit-Or-Miss

Perfect for Baby Showers: Diaper Sushi

diapersushi1

It can’t be easy, growing up different. With all the other little sushi babies looking like slices of salmon and tuna and eel, and you, with your dry, white, cottony skin, waiting for the day someone might want to eat you.

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Nom Nom Bib

It’s not easy to look unbearably adorable when you’re getting your nom on like a true FOODBEAST. I’m pretty sure that’s why they invented this particular bib.

Start donning this piece of work and your cuteness factor will increase by about 12x, which would put yours truly right around a 12. Who am I kidding? I couldn’t possibly be more adorable. My mom says so every day.

Seriously though, the bib goes for about $8 for you fans of adorable sandwich designs.

(via ThinkGeek)

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Blank Canvas Bib

Let your little Jackson Pollock create a work of art at every mealtime.  This 100% cotton bib is printed with a blank canvas on which the child can spatter and dribble various designs.  Two silhouetted figures admire the creations, so the tiny artist will always have an audience.  ($15 @ Uncommon Goods)

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Adult Bib

Don’t laugh. I know it was just last night I wish I had this thing at the seafood restaurant, covering my new suit before that dipping sauce got the best of me. We’re looking at an Adult Bib with a moisture barrier, made from a 30 x 18″ piece of Terry Cloth. The middle of the bib features a 17 x 20″ oversized moisture barrier. ($9.98 @ TaylorGifts)