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Humor Restaurants

Buffalo Wild Wings’ Wants You To Rub Hot Sauce On Your Face For April Fool’s

With April Fool’s Day only a few days away, restaurant chains and brands are going all out with their pranks. Buffalo Wild Wings’ entry into the foolish festivities is their “new” Rally Beard Sauce.

The new flavor is “scientifically designed to stimulate beard growth,” as well as help fans rally their March Madness teams back from the the brink of despair. Anyone longing for a thicker beard will want to slather some sauce onto their hands and apply it to your facial area.

For optimal results, gently rub the sauce in a downward 45 degree movement from the nose as beard-ready nutrients create a patented tingle that accelerates Rally Beard growth. After one minute, simply remove the sauce coat with Buffalo Wild Wings wet naps and repeat as necessary. Rally Beard Sauce guarantees long growth and subsequently, big wins for your team.

Aside from hair growth, the sauce also boasts a spicy garlic flavor.

Fellow Foodbeast and Hispanic Heathcliff, Isai Rocha, was sent a bottle of BWW’s Rally Sauce. While apprehensive with the idea of rubbing hot sauce on his face, he did express desire to have a heftier head of facial hair.

Note: In case it’s not obvious that you shouldn’t be rubbing hot sauce on your face, please do not actually rub hot sauce on your face. The only beard you’ll grow is one of pain and misery. 

Categories
Fast Food Humor Restaurants Video

This KFC Commercial From Japan Ups The Ante On Ridiculousness [WATCH]

We’ve seen our fair share of crazy fast food commercials from around the world. One of the more recent ones being an epic movie-quality series for Pepsi.

RocketNews 24 shared KFC Japan’s latest promotional video, where the fried chicken chain sets out to hype “tare” (sauce). In a tribute to ’80s VHS aesthetics, the three-minute video features some of the most ridiculous scenarios set to fast-paced cuts and lots of shouting.

The video focuses on a man from the T.A.R.E Scientific Research Institute and his journey to find the ultimate sauce. Along the way he meets ninjas dressed as maids, a chicken filet tribe, and deities. His entire adventure is set to an original song sung by popular international artist Ladybeard.

While initially confused at how ridiculous and random this commercial was, the spot sure accomplished its purpose. Now we want some saucy chicken.

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Beer Brewed with Actual Beard Hair Exists

beard-beer

Beard Beer, sounds like a bro’s choice of brew right? Maybe, if you’re into beer literally brewed from beard yeast.

Created by Rogue Ales, Brewmaster John Maier came up with the idea on a whim. Just for funsies one day, Maier extracted yeast from his very own beard to produce a sweet, distinct ale, or “Beard Beer.”

Available to order online, the product description helps to clarify any misconceptions, just in case you thought things were getting a little too hairy.

It’s here! Our latest brew dedicated to Beards, Beard Beer is brewed with a yeast created from Brewmaster John Maier’s Beard. No Need to freak out, Brewers have used wild yeasts in beer making for centuries. John has had the same Old Growth Beard since 1983 and for over 15,000 brews, so it is no great surprise that a natural yeast ideal for brewing was discovered in his beard.

What does Beard Beer taste like? Try it, we think you’ll be surprised…

I’m not too sure I’m into those kinds of surprises.

Just to clarify, this isn’t a “shake due to settling” situation, and the brew doesn’t have any wild hairs floating around in it. Whew, that makes it all better, right?

Beard Beer, $6.75 @ Rogue

H/T + PicThx That’s Nerdalicious, Cool Material

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

This Beer Has Human Beard Hair in it, On Purpose

From a brewing company whose flavor folio includes “Good Chit Pilsner” and “OREgasmic Ale,” a beer made with yeast pulled from nine strands of human beard hair probably shouldn’t be too surprising — but it is a little gross.

The hairs in question belong to a one John Maier, brew master of Rogue Ales in Newport, Ore., which – in search of its next signature yeast – decided “for fun” to toss the strands of Maier’s 34 year old beard into a culture plate, and found the resulting yeast produced a beer whose aroma was “mild” and “fruity” and “lacked any harsh, medicinal flavors that sometimes result from using wild yeast.” Never mind the teensy-weensy molecules of dead human skin.

According to yeast ecologist Kyria Boundy-Mills, the surprising yeast probably got deposited on the 57 year old Maier’s beard sometime during his 20 years of brewing experience – possibly even being a hybrid of Rogue’s own house yeast (called “Pacman” yeast) and a wild strain.

The result? A beer with a spicy flavor profile which Rogue president Brett Joyce says they don’t want to mask, and in fact, intend to make into a new beer for next spring: the New Crustacean, the more hirsute companion to the brand’s existing Old Crustacean Barleywine.

I don’t know about you, but I foresee this being a pretty hard one to sell at parties. “Oh don’t worry, it doesn’t have any actual human beard in it. No, no just beard yeast.”

I think I’ll keep my Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout, thanks.

H/T: The Scientist, Tim Bulone

Categories
Products

Beard Flask-For the Manly

Why bother drinking from a normal flask when you can up your manliness with a beard flask? This is for all the guys, or girls, that can’t grow their own facial hair. It is also for the people who can. Two beards are better than one. (Thx IT)