Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Domino’s Kinky Sriracha Pizza Ad Is 50 Shades of WTF

Damn. 50 Shades of Grey continues to ruin everything.

This is a real print advertisement running in Israel for Domino’s Sriracha Pizza:

dominos1_aotw_0

Created by advertising behemoth McCann Erickson’s McCann Israel branch, this ad pulls no punches (or spankings) with this disturbingly realistic tongue. Bound, gagged and surrounded by instruments of torture, it’s not clear if this tongue consented to this BDSM play.

But who needs consent in a world where Twilight fanfiction can become a best-selling, inaccurate novel about an already stigmatized community?

Update: The advertisement was a rejected pitch to a franchise in Israel. Tim McIntyre, a spokesperson told Perez Hilton:

“It’s real. The ad was created and pitched by an agency to the independent franchise in Israel. It never ‘officially’ appeared anywhere, because it was ill-advised, unfunny and not brand-appropriate. In a word, it was stupid…[The ad is] being presented as something that actually ran in Israeli media. It did not.”

Domino’s seems to be taking the mix-up in sexy strides:


Picthx Ads of the World

Categories
FOODBEAST

Foodfapping 2012: The Year in Sex-Related Food News

Face it, the best part of not dying during Mayan Doomsday is knowing we still get to enjoy the two things that make this life worth living: Food and sex.

Here’s some of the best, worst, strangest and most OMGWTFBBQ-worthy sex-related news stories we saw this year.

Enter at your own risk.

 

1. Happy Steak and Blowjob Day!

Celebrated on March 14, AKA “Valentine’s Day for men,” the day for all you ladies out there to “show your man just how much you care.”

 

2. Whiskey Dick, the World’s First Whiskey-Flavored Lube

The guys from Epic Meal Time made a whiskey-flavored personal lubricant, to use on Steak and Blow Job Day I guess.

 

3. Selling Sex Out of a Food Truck

Here’s a lesson you can take away from this story about a Long Island food truck owner who tried selling her escort services on the side: Never trust the “secret sauce.”

 

4. Japanese Artist Cooks Up and Serves Own Genitalia

Can you say sausage fest?

 

5. How to Drink Wine and Not Fall Asleep Before Sexy Times

Thanks to sex therapist Dr. Ruth, you can now drink wine with only 6% ABV, which is apparently just enough to get you frisky, but not enough for naptime. Finally!

 

6. Don’t Have Sex With Olive Oil as Lubricant — Or This Can Happen

Hint: Don’t make jokes about Pam Cooking Spray either, ’cause ain’t none of this funny.

 

7. Mushroom or Masturbation Toy?

That’s the question that plagued one poor Chinese news station, who unfortunately broadcast the wrong answer throughout most of Asia. Oops?

 

8. Chocolate Penis Cowboy Hats – Yes, Really

Say “howdy” to our little friends.

 

9. STD Cupcakes – For If You’ve Ever Thought About Banging a Cupcake

Brought to us by a few of the grody minds at Eat Your Heart Out, these disease-ridden clapcakes have actually helped to promote STD awareness. Hell, I believe it. Ew.

 

10. PETA Makes A Video About Carrot Penises

The secret to staying long and strong? Eat your veggies, apparently. Now there’s something you won’t learn about in sex ed.

 

11. In more WTF Olive Oil News: Don’t Inject Your Penis With The Stuff — Or This Can Happen

Answer: Your penis won’t grow larger and it’ll actually fall off and die.

 

12. The 50 Shades of Chicken Cookbook

Possibly the only good thing to come out of this year’s 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon. Because topless chefs and BDSM poultry? Hot.

 

13. Chocolate Viagra?

The EU is raring to release a “natural alternative” to everyone’s favorite little blue pill. According to Angus Kennedy, founder of Kennedy’s Confection trade magazine, “It’s an all-natural ingredient which could give men the legendary staying power of some of the world’s greatest lovers.” Mmmm, sounds super sexy.

Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

Dripping Thighs, Chicken with a Lardon & More in 50 Shades of Chicken

I call it the Harry Potter tipping point: nothing can get that famous that quickly, and not inspire an inordinate amount of parodies. Recently, the media’s wittiest have been going after the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, the adult, fan-fictionalized BDSM version of Twilight, resulting in SNL skits, Twitter posts, talk show retellings, and even a musical. So, it was only a matter of time before the foodie world got a hold of it, too.

Unfortunately, the countless innuendos to be made don’t really put me in the mind for food. In fact, I prefer all my food and BDSM to be separate. Apparently, I’m in the minority, if this YouTube trailer for the parody cookbook “50 Shades of Chicken” is anything to go by. Featuring pictures of semi-nude men handling (read: groping) raw chicken (breasts), and recipes titles like “Dripping Thighs” and “Chicken with a Lardon”, the book/video seek to…I dunno, sell more copies?