Categories
Hit-Or-Miss

A Play-By-Play Of The World Pasta Eating Championship In Las Vegas

Pasta Eating Champion Matt Stonie and Steve Martorano

As it stood, the record for the most pasta consumed in 10 minutes was 6.23 pounds, but that record was completely obliterated at the Martorano’s Masters World Pasta Eating Championship, October 17.

A slew of competitors, from a 71-year-old eater they call “The Locust,” to a petite 115-pound woman known as the “Cardboard Shell,” all viciously stuffed pasta down their throats, trying to win the 2-foot high pasta eating championship trophy, and show that carbs mean nothing to them.

In just 10 minutes, these competitive monsters went from almost swallowing the bowls whole, to regretting their life decisions and slowly getting defeated by the gluten-filled feast.

If you’ve never experienced an eating competition, just know things can get pretty intense. Thankfully I recorded the sights and sounds I witnessed during the championship.

This is how it went down:

 

12:59-1:16 – The contestants are brought out one by one with the announcer providing interesting (and mostly outrageously false) facts about each contestant. The variety in height, weight and age amongst the contestants is amazing.

 

1:18 – And they’re off to the races! It seems like none of the contestants are even chewing. Competitor Steve Hendry finishes the first bowl!

 

1:19 – Miki Sudo somehow manages to chug a bottle of water while her mouth is stuffed with pasta. She literally has strings of pasta sticking out from every part of her mouth and just shoves the bottle right into the middle of her mouth, right into the eye of the pasta storm. She has four bowls done already!

 

1:20 – The #1 ranked eater in the world Matt Stonie is the only competitor that hasn’t slowed down his intake at all.

 

 

1:21 – The 71-year-old Rich LeFevre has sauce all over his face. Literally all over his face. His forehead, his cheeks, some of his hair even. It looks like Chef Boyardee gave birth in his mouth. It’s kind of disgusting.

 

1:22 – Miki Sudo is at eight plates, Stonie is at nine. The unranked eaters aren’t even close to where the ranked eaters are. Just go home, guys.

 

1:23 – The 115-pound Michelle Lesco is at eight plates. Where the hell is she putting all this pasta!?

 

1:24 – Stonie is at 16 bowls! Ron “The Optic” Koch has begun using his hands to scoop up and eat the food on his shirt. Illegal? Maybe. Shameless? Oh yeah.
1:25 – Miki Sudo just held her hand to her mouth and turned away for a second. Holding in food or holding in vomit? Either way, I’m suddenly attracted to her and it worries me.

 

1:26 – Many of the contestants are beginning to chew their food and struggling to swallow, with so much in their bellies already. And just like that, the contest comes to an abrupt halt! Time is up! All the contestants seem to be struggling a bit. Many of them have sauce all over their faces. Oh God, it’s in their eyebrows, it looks so weird.

 

1:27 – A minute after the competition has ended and some contestants are STILL chewing!

 

1:28 – Mary Bowers, only two minutes after the competition and still standing on stage, has already cleaned her face and is reapplying her makeup. On the flipside, one of her female rivals, Lesley Ryder, continues to show signs of trying not to barf.

 

1:30 – The judges are examining the bowls to make sure they’re empty, or else the competitors get docked points. Results should be announced shortly.
1:34 – And the winners are announced! Congratulations on your victory, Matt Stonie, eating 10 pounds of pasta! The record of 6.23 pounds is no more.

Take a look at the madness below:

By Sean Fahmy

Sean's favorite foods are hot wings, cheeseburgers, seafood and gummy candy. He will likely die from both diabetes and obesity, or "diabesity." He's cool with that.

Leave a Reply