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Fast Food

McDonald’s All Day Breakfast Forgets Best Sandwiches, Makes Home Alone-esque Mistake

People, the moment we’ve all been waiting for has finally come upon us: McDonald’s will be serving breakfast all day! For the first time ever, I won’t have to drag my lazy, hungover ass out of bed at 9 a.m. on a Sunday morning just to make it there in time. Instead, I can wait until I’m good and ready to leave my bed, and that makes the little fatboy inside of me ecstatic.

That being said, I advise you to temper your expectations. While this news is exciting for the average fast food enthusiast, it comes with a major setback: the All-Day Breakfast Menu will be limited depending on region. Unfortunately, that’s not even the worst part.

According to the McDonald’s Twitter page, the fast food chain won’t be serving their delicious McGriddles or golden hash browns at a vast number of chains beyond 10:30 a.m.

“Hey, are you gonna eat that? Oh, it’s a napkin? Ah fuck it, it’s got cheese on it, gimme.”

What the McFuck is your problem, McDonalds?

Eater.com rated the McGriddle as the number one ranked breakfast food at McDonalds, so why is it not on the All-Day Breakfast menu? Do you want me to take my breakfast needs to Taco Bell? BECAUSE I WILL. On top of that, no location will serve both biscuits and McMuffins all day, only one or the other. That’s like getting trained to shoot free throws from an NBA player, but the player is Shaq.

While it’s a great start for McDonalds to finally focus on the admirers they already have rather than the ones they long for, it’s still not enough to really please anyone. Opening up their menu to feature breakfast food all day is a fantastic step in the right direction, but if they don’t put the nationally beloved McGriddle on that menu soon, I’m going to start dancing dirtily with the daughters of the McDonald’s executives that are making these poppycock decisions. Nobody puts McGriddle in the corner.

By Sean Fahmy

Sean's favorite foods are hot wings, cheeseburgers, seafood and gummy candy. He will likely die from both diabetes and obesity, or "diabesity." He's cool with that.

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