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Hooters Is Giving Out Free Wings to Single People on Valentine’s Day

Most Valentine’s Days spent single are passed in a concentrated effort to forget your ex but, on this year’s Valentine’s Day, Hooters is asking for your remembrance of what was.

On February 14th, during the yearly reminder of our societal obligation to companionship, Hooters is offering up the chance to get 10 free boneless wings. The only condition is you must bring in a picture of your former significant other to be shredded, because people still shred pictures like it’s a mid-2000’s lowbrow romcom, evidently.

But, if you’re living in 2020 like the rest of us, and your photo library is on your phone or computer, you can digitally shred your ex as well. You’ll be presented with a voucher you can use to redeem your chicken nuggets — er, boneless wings, excuse me.

Unfortunately, a rather difficult dilemma faces you after your former flame has been extinguished and 10 boneless wings are in your possession: Do you squad up with all the other people who decided to go to Hooters on Valentine’s Day or do you go home and eat your Hooters wings alone while solemnly curled up on the couch? Both are equally as existential crisis triggering but, hey, at least you’ll have ten free wings, right?

Right?