Categories
#foodbeast Brand FOODBEAST Hacks Health Products SPONSORED Toasty

Can Cannabis Enhance Your Love Life?

Millennials make up a burnt-out generation that’s accustomed to hiding behind screens. As such, we’re tired, anxious, and constantly comparing our bodies and wallets to those of “influencers.” The speed of our thoughts makes Usain Bolt look slow, and all of this has absolutely trickled down to how we approach our sex and dating lives.

When it comes to, ahem, “relations,” Gen-Y and Z live (miserably!) in a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am culture; and even if you’ve figured out how to navigate the exhausting emotional side effects and social dynamics of sex, the act itself presents all sorts of hurdles. We’re so disconnected from ourselves and each other, and while we’re good at getting it on, we’re terrible at actually getting off.

Did you know the most powerful sexual organ in the body is the brain? Yep! Forget about having the juiciest peach or thickest summer squash on the farm, so to speak. Our minds are the biggest aphrodisiacs, and pleasure transcends what’s physically happening between our legs. Knowing this, it’s clear that the best way to facilitate intimacy is by simply making enough space in your mind for another person. The easiest way? With some of that elevated greenery, if you will.

“Hold up,” you say. “Using the devil’s lettuce to clear out my head sounds about as logical as Anna Nicole Smith and J. Howard Marshall’s wedding.”

Photo courtesy of Blüm

I thought so too, until doing some serious experimentation with products from Blüm dispensaries. With specific products custom-tailored to the different stages of love-making — from beginning to climax — the possibilities of a higher state of pleasure are an endless wave of satisfaction.

FOREPLAY, MORE PLAY

Photo courtesy of Blüm

Let’s look at indica strains, for example, which have always gotten a bad reputation for leaving their consumers horizontal and brain-dead for hours. Isn’t that the goal here? Out of your head and into the bed, I say! The act of sharing a fatty with someone naturally leads to eye contact, hand grazing, all that nostalgically erotic middle school stuff. I love rolling one with Canndescent’s “Cruise” flower, which is wildly euphoric and kind of like foreplay in and of itself. Seriously — one finger feels like ten. I’ll leave it at that.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Humboldt Apothecary (@humboldtapothecary) on

You could also take it one step further with Humboldt Apothecary’s Love Potion #7. The elixir contains naturally warming herbs cacao, cardamom, cinnamon, and vanilla, ancient aphrodisiac damiana, and kava kava — known amongst herbalists and bougie hippies as nature’s Xanax — all alongside a solid 8.4mg of THC per dose.

The best part? It can be drunk OR rubbed onto your and your partner’s private parts. Fair warning— this stuff tastes a bit, erm, musty, but perhaps those underlying notes of mothball will lead to illicit fantasies about doing the deed in the attic of your childhood home or something. Hot! If nothing else, the shared experience of consuming a “love potion” spices things up. I can also confirm this successfully heated my nether regions all the way up to rival the temps in said hypothetical musty attic.  

THE MAIN EVENT

Nice and relaxed? Great — let’s get moving! All this sensitivity and closeness will likely lead to a gym-worthy ‘sweat sesh’ and take a toll on your body. Everybody complains about ugly “big O” faces, but have you ever seen a muscle cramp face? Way worse; a buzzkill for the AGES.

Photo courtesy of Blüm

Papa & Barkley’s Releaf transdermal patches keep bodies agile and the mood red hot — or cold, actually. A base of menthol and camphor mixed with a variety of CBD/THC ratios literally sends shivers up and down your spine; a double whammy of pleasure, since looser limbs means lasting longer, too. The only downside is that if you put one inside your wrist or on the back of your neck, as the packaging suggests, you’re going to look like a sex-crazed drug addict in the 60s.

(Not so bad, on second thought.)

THE COME DOWN IS AS GOOD AS THE COME UP

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Kikoko (@kikoko_hq) on

All good things must come to an end, though, and sex is no exception. Post-coitus is the perfect time to introduce Sativas — the brain needs to be fiery again to keep the dream alive. Indulge in some strawberry shortcake Mellows to simultaneously satisfy munchies, or rehydrate with a pot of Kikoko’s Sensuali-tea. At that point, whether to continue or get the eff out of your partner’s house is entirely up to you. Either way, keep letting your freak flag fly.

Disclaimers:

  • This content was created in partnership with Blüm.
  • These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration.
  • These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
  • The statements in this article are for informational and educational purposes only. This does not constitute an advertisement or offer to sell any marijuana or other cannabis-derived products. It is intended for persons over the age of 21.
  • Although Marijuana is recreationally legal in California and Nevada, you must be at least 21 years of age to buy, possess or consume cannabis products of any kind. It is illegal to sell or advertise cannabis-derived products to anyone under the age of 21 or in locations where persons under 21 are expected to be found.
  • Do not over consume any drug or controlled substance, even if it is legal to do so. Always use good judgment when consuming marijuana, and do so responsibly.
  • Marijuana can impair your judgment and the ability to operate kitchen appliances and other machinery.

This content was created in partnership with Blüm.

Categories
#foodbeast Adventures Alcohol Culture Feel Good Hit-Or-Miss Opinion

A Year Past Hurricane Maria, Some Puerto Rican Relief Efforts Center Around Experiencing Their Cuisine

Plantains. That was the first image that came to mind when I heard the words “Puerto Rico,” followed closely by all-you-can-drink mojitos, tan butts, and an overwhelming sense of guilt at the mere idea of wanting these things in the post-Hurricane Maria climate. So when Bacardí invited me down to take a first-hand look at the crisis intervention and relief efforts happening in San Juan, I figured it would equally satisfy the appetites of the both the angel and the devil on my shoulders.

With Bacardí operating as the beating heart of San Juan — or, at least, its pacemaker — the liquor company’s sustainability efforts are impressive from all angles. An unused aging warehouse was converted into a Stop-and-Go Community Relief Center, where local residents could come for food, water, medical care, and uplifting activities such as movies. Then there’s the partnership with Lonely Whale, called “The Future Doesn’t Suck,” which seeks to eliminate one billion straws worldwide by 2020. I was horrified to see just how much plastic was scattered on a small patch of sand in Piñones, where our group donned workers’ gloves on shaky hangover hands and picked up garbage. When you consider how central beaches are as a respite to recovering locals and incentive for visiting tourists, the initiative seems doubly as important.  

There are also more specialized relief efforts being championed by extended members of the Bacardi family, based on their individual skill sets. Puerto Rican-born, internationally-acclaimed chef Manolo Lopez — who cooked one of the best meals of my life — flew back to San Juan immediately after Maria to feed two to three thousand people a day on-site. He also decided to pivot his Instagram platform from promotion of his various businesses to calls to action.

“We knew that once the media stopped talking about the disaster, we’d be invisible again,” he says. Almost a year a later, he laments that the time has come.  

“90% of food is still brought into Puerto Rico. There are still people on the island with no power and no water. Their roofs are completely open, and they’re taking showers and washing clothes outside.”

So, how can we North Americans do our part?

“Right now, it’s not about donating to these big funds, like Red Cross,” Manolo continues. “Visit the island. The culture is so rich, the food is amazing, the people are so warm. Come down here and just do it — it’s the best way possible.”

He wasn’t the only one who thought so. Utilizing my world-revered (not) Spanglish skills, I broke away from the group and asked everyone who looked in my direction how I, or any foreigner, could ACTUALLY help. From headshop owners to Uber drivers, local restaurant managers to international brand ambassadors, the consensus was the same: visit. Cast aside your fear of the unknown, of places deemed “unruly” and “unsafe,” and come put your money where your mouth is. Eat, drink, and shop at small businesses.

And as for me, they all insisted, do not dwell on the devastation, because everyone already knows what went down. Instead, write about the Puerto Rico that lifts its people up — the passionate, soulful community I got to experience with all my senses.

 

Photos: Kadeem Cobham
Categories
#foodbeast Alcohol Cravings Drinks Fast Food FOODBEAST News Restaurants What's New

New Items, Like Avocado Tostada, Are Being Tested At Chipotle’s New Test Kitchen

Like In-N-Out, Chipotle’s power to consistently pop off is largely in its collection of secret items and people who know about them. Knowing this, the company has created a special public test kitchen called NEXT in Chelsea, Manhattan, and its menu is literally made up of things you’ve begged the staff to make you… without the extra dollop of lost dignity.

“I get the majority of my inspiration from customers,” head chef Chad Brauze says. “I ask the people who work the line: what are people ordering? What are the craziest combinations they want?”

The quesadilla you used to whisper and wink for, for example, is now being tested at the NEXT kitchen with meat, fajitas, or sofritas, and a side of rice and beans (I ordered mine with steak and after my first bite got so aroused that I started sweating. That’s real). Besides that, a pile of corn chips gets smothered in queso and your choice of beans and salsa — BANG, nachos. The frozen Paloma, a margarita-like slushee of Sauza tequila, grapefruit, lime, agave, and soda, may help it all go down a little easier. Or you can just choose the spring mix salad with creamy avocado citrus vinaigrette. Throw a scoop of quinoa (!) on there and you’ll earn your right to order a cinnamon and cardamom-infused Mexican chocolate shake for dessert.

Chad and I had this really cute moment where we bonded over our shared #basic status and admitted we both thought the avocado tostada (“The Chipotle version of avocado toast!!” exclaim the PR girls) was the tastiest offering. Of course you know that guacamole is always extra, but in this case, it’s really EXTRA; the uber-fried corn tortilla was smeared so thick in hand-mashed avo that I was able to hold it up vertically and no toppings moved. If #guacgoals as a hashtag and/or culture is not currently a ‘thing’, it damn well is now.

It’s hard to stand out as a Mexican fast food chain in 2018 — Taco Bell’s got the Doritos collab and Naked Chicken thing going on, and Dos Toros constantly comes through with limited edition merch — so Chipotle’s NEXT kitchen is an interesting breeding ground for more unconventional items to be tested before nationwide consumption.

Towards the end of our conversation, I asked Chad if he was worried that making off-menu items public knowledge would take away some of Chipotle’s hard-earned clout.

After a moment of hesitation, he revealed that the people have already spoken — and ordered. Queso + red sauce + carnitas is apparently Chipotle’s patron-powered version of ordering something ‘Animal Style,’ and hibiscus lemonade is in the recipe dugout, set for release in the future.

Though it’s yet to be determined if any of these test kitchen items will go nationwide, and without a guarantee that they even will, the fact that Chipotle has unveiled a means to test items outside of their regular menu at NEXT is an encouraging sign that they are keeping innovation in mind going forward. 

Like wine, cheese, and your senile grandmother, it seems that the more things age, the more they seem to attain that lovable, snackable je ne sais quoi. Good old Chipotle is no exception.

 

Photos & story: @healthishell